Inside Erin: The AIF Community Newsletter
Volume 4 Number 12 - December 2008

A Letter from the Editor -- Purple Dragon

Merry Christmas everyone.  I know that it is still several weeks off, but by the 
time I next talk to you it will be long over, so let me say it now.  Besides, 
I've already noticed the Christmas music playing here and there so we must be in 
the season.

Congratulations to A. Bomire for winning the Halloween story comp.  His story, 
Dream Lover was awesome.  It has a depth of plot, characterization, and 
sensitivity that you don't often see in erotic fiction, and the fact that so 
many of you seemed to have enjoyed it suggests that some of that same depth is 
present in the community as a whole.  I'd also like to give an honorable mention 
to first time author magnusamor for his very imaginative and hot story, A 
Flexible Masquerade.  We thank him for his participation and hop to see more 
soon.

Reading and writing the Christmas stories and poems that appear in this issue 
kind of got me into a naughty holiday mood, so I pulled out Santa's Little 
Helper.  No, that's NOT a euphemism for my package, it's a game by A. Bomire.  
If you want to play a very nice little Christmas themed game, give it a try.  
There is a review of it later in this issue.

Last month I talked a little about a couple of other game creation communities 
out there.  Basically, groups of people who are doing the same types of things 
that we are.  Most of the games created by them have a specific theme running 
throughout, but in general, I find more similarities than differences between 
their communities and ours.

This month I'd like to welcome two new writers, and introduce two new articles 
that we are adding to the Newsletter.  In the same spirit as BBBen's "This Month 
in AIF", which has appeared in just about every issue of this Newsletter since 
it began nearly four years ago, these new articles will keep us all abreast of 
what is happening in those other communities.  Nandi Bear will be telling us 
what's going on at TF Games Site, while TeraS tunes us in to events over at 
HypnoPics Collective.  I would like to thank them both for taking the time to do 
this, and I hope that it becomes a regular feature.  If you see something 
interesting, don't hesitate to wander over and take a look.  Links to both sites 
can be found at both The AIF Archive and AIFGames.com.

*	*	*

This Month in AIF by BBBen

Two months to go until the Threesome comp deadline! (31st of January 2009) Get 
your entries ready for this once in an AIF lifetime event!

Anyway, this has been a really quiet month, so I have very little to talk about. 
Dudemandude has updated his general AIF extension for I7. Other than that the 
only notable activity has been on the "Live AIF" forum on AIFGames.com. Here 
there have been several active threads, with Holet's The Test and Unforseen 
Consequences threads, Purple Dragon's old The Orgy - Live AIF thread and even my 
old AIF Improv thread all seeing activity this month. Thanks, incidentally, to 
Dudemandude for taking over the AIF Improv thread - it's nice to see the story 
continuing even though I don't seem to have the mojo to keep it going myself 
right now.

Bye for now. Keep your teeth clean.

*	*	*

This Month at TFGamesSite by Nandi Bear

Welcome to Nandi world. Wait, you say, who is Nandi Bear? Well it happened many 
years ago when, as a child, I was stranded in the Kenya jungle, only to be found 
and raised by a family of Chemists. Using their internet connection I...

Oh wait, you mean you want the truth?

Well this whole deal started when the predecessor of TFgames, run by the mighty 
Golderndawn (there will be many names, please try to keep up), went splunk 
(technical term, means broke) and Golderndawn decided to go off and have a real 
life for a while, get married and roam the lands of Middle Earth, sorry I mean 
New Zealand.  Into the fold stepped the wonderful, nice, kind and extremely 
talented TinaB (all of whose nice comments about me I agree with) who started 
the TFgames as a new home for all us Transgender (TG) and Transformation (TF) 
enthusiasts. Now I'd contributed a bit to the previous forum, even posted a few 
games (well-half games, I have more half finished games on TFgames than anyone 
else!), but as a new poster in an already established group I mainly kept my 
opinions to myself.  When the new forum started I waded in with my opinions in 
full effect.

So what's this got to do with me sitting here and wading through all this babble 
you ask yourself?  I'm getting to that. Recently a discussion was brought up on 
AIF and TFgames, separately, about merging these two and HypnoPics Collective, 
into a kind of super group. The great, wonderful and talented Purple Dragon (who 
coincidentally happens to be my editor) actually took the time to ask us our 
opinions on the idea. The general opinion was no, but some idiot suggested an 
article in this very publication as a monthly update on what was going on in the 
groups, to keep everyone together.  Oh wait, that idiot was me.  As the one who 
suggested the idea, when Purple Dragon and TinaB asked if I would contribute an 
article, well who was I to refuse?

But before I give an update on this month's events, I thought I'd start by 
introducing you to one of the many talented people who contributes to TFgames. 
I'll start with one of our most talented game creators you've never heard of, 
Kimberly Rex.

Now some of you might have seen Kimberly's first game, The Girly Gauntlet, which 
was leaked onto AIF by a well-meaning fan. This game was, I think unfairly, 
slated, mostly for a few graphic images. Although even Kimberly admits that the 
images may have been a mistake, I've always thought it weird that an adult group 
would be so upset by a few adult images, but that's just me.  Kimberly's real 
talents have shown thanks to a (re)introduction of an idea on TFgames, a regular 
game creation contest. The brainchild of TinaB (who went ahead with the idea 
despite me suggesting otherwise, which show what I know), influenced/inspired by 
similar AIF competitions. 

Kimberly was leaning towards smaller games anyway, as in the wonderful An 
Unexpected Way to Spend a Saturday, but I think the contests are where 
Kimberly's talents really shine.  We agreed to a 5-room limit, and most people, 
myself included, when presented with such a limit produce small, almost 
claustrophobic games, not Kimberly. Through clever use of objects, rooms and 
time Kimberly manages to create games that seem much bigger than their size 
suggests.

But no, that's not Kimberly's only talent, Kimberly is also one of the most 
talented photo manipulator that I know in the TFgames community. Now I know that 
in the general AIF community, with its focus on well written (hopefully) 
erotica, people don't necessary put as much value on images. After all, pictures 
of sex are, well, just porn, and there are plenty of sites out there for that.  
But for transformation and transgender games, where the changes to the 
protagonist are part of the fun, a well done set of transformations (or the 
illusions of such) along with, of course, good writing will really enhance a 
player's gaming experience.

And for those reason I think Kimberly Rex is one of the best of the current 
batch of TFgames' game writers. It helps that my one claim to (almost) fame is 
that I helped Kimberly fix a relatively minor bug in her first game.

Now on to the main event, this month in TFgames, for the months of October / 
November. I know that's two months, but it all makes sense as the main event of 
the month was a Halloween challenge, thanks to the generosity of Luna Blue 
(12z).  Differing from TinaB's regular contests (one of which finished just 
before), the generous prizes, as well as the nature of the challenge (a horror/ 
Halloween themed game of course) resulted in four (well three at least) 
wonderful games:

	The Theater an RPGmaker game by Test Zero: A set of costumes found at a 
	theater leads to a very unusual Halloween.
	
	Trick or Treat a RAGS game by Sally (73): A witch in an abandoned house 
gives 
you a choice of whether to be a good girl or a bad one.
	
	The Haunted House by Maelyn: An html choose your own adventure where an 
	abandoned mansion holds a few spooky surprises.

	I, a RAGS games by some hack called Nandi Bear

The voting only just started and lasts until the 12th of December, so there's 
still time to try all the games and cast your vote.  It also mean's I can't 
really say what I think of these games, though I enjoyed them all.

The other main event is the release of a new game, Hanayome (The Brides) part 2 
by Magicmaximus. Now I've not got around to playing this game, it's on my to do 
list, and I've never really got on with RPGmaker, though I try to play all the 
games, so I don't know exactly how the game plays. I have however had the honor 
of working with magicmaximus and know that what he produces is well thought out 
and incredibly well written so I'd expect nothing but good things from this 
game.

Finally we've had an influx of new members, mostly RPGmaker players wanting help 
on the games currently posted. A few however have posted on one of the regular 
"what everyone's creating" threads, suggesting that a few new game creators and 
games could be in the works.

Well if everyone's happy with what I've written, then I'll be back next issue. 
Remember everything here is my own opinion, and if you want to argue or discuss 
anything with me either come see me on the TFgamessite.com or e-mail on 
nandibear AT yahoo DOT com

Be seeing you.

*	*	*

Collectively Made: This Month at the Collective by TeraS

My name is TeraS and I am one of the Mods at the Hypno-Pics Collective. Some of 
you may know me from the RP Section there or from some of the manips that I have 
posted there... This is a little report on what has been happening at the 
Collective for the month of November 2008 in the Games Section:

Malroth, one of the members of the Collective, put out a request for ideas for a 
game he is working on. In his words: 

"I'm using Game maker to restart work on my long abandoned idea to make my own 
Slave training/brainwashing game in the same vein as slave project Ds and slave 
maker.

The basic premise is that an evil totalitarian government rules the world and 
you are one of their agents "reforming" captured rebels. Several forms of overt 
mind control will be available with respective drawbacks. Also more subtle forms 
of persuasion will be available as you will be able to gradually change their 
likes and dislikes through positive and negative reinforcement.

I'm starting this thread in hope to troll out ideas, comments and opinions that 
might help me when creating this.

Current status: Early, Early stages... some of the sprite handling engine is 
coded, have an idea of SOME activities you can make your slave perform.

What I need: Activities... aka something you can make your victim do, what ideal 
effect it would have on their psyche, what needs it meets, and a location where 
this might take place at... having several activities per location would be 
ideal but not entirely necessary."

And you can add ideas to his thread here: http://hypnopics-
collective.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14267

Also, there was an announcement from Lydia02 that she is beginning work on 
University Sim 2. In her words:

"I've just posted what I hope to be the final version of University Sim1. After 
a fair break from coding, I'm considering doing the sequel. My original 
intention was a dating sim, which is what the new game will be. Corwin will be 
returning to the University but this time it's to win one of the girls. This 
will be based roughly on the dating sim games such as Sim Girls. The player will 
need to build up stats in various areas such as: charm, intelligence, strength, 
etc. in order to develop a relationship with the girls. Each girl will have 
different areas that are important to them. The player will need to not only 
build up the relevant stats but also spend time with the girls in order to 
succeed in increasing the relationship level. There will be a set number of days 
for the game and an energy level that determines how much a player can do per 
day. Similiar to other sim dating games. I haven't decided whether the player 
will be able to finish the game with more than one girl yet. I'm leaning towards 
such an option as this will in essence provide a variance in skill level for the 
game. Therefore there will be something for the new player as well as the 
experienced one.

The reason for my post is that I learned the hard way how much of a pain it is 
to change a game when a good deal of work has already been completed. With this 
in mind, I welcome input at this preliminary stage. Keep in mind that it's my 
intention to do a dating sim. I look forward to everyone's thoughts."

And you can add ideas here: http://hypnopics-
collective.net/viewtopic.php?f=11&t=14221


And finally, a new game was released on the Collective by mrblank.

It can be found at: http://hypnopics-
collective.net/cpg132/displayimage.php?pos=-82402
and http://hypnopics-collective.net/cpg132/displayimage.php?pos=-82401

And in his words:

"what's up doc(s)?

Having a "challenging" year so I'm sorry I missed your inspiring works and can 
only visit every month or so...

Well, at least I hope you enjoy K.I.S.S : my hypno celebs card game (with a 
"make your own game" option)"


And that's about all gamewise on the Collective this month...

Please remember that if you want to visit the Collective to get the games or 
post ideas you will need to join the Collective Board and Gallery separately!

Have a great December!

TeraS

*	*	*

Christmas Stories and Poems

...and your enemies closer
by A. Bomire

Doug waited impatiently by his car, stamping his feet in the cold to keep warm. 
After his recent break-up with his girlfriend, he was eager, even anxious, to 
begin the Christmas break from the university. Gas prices being what they were 
(and a college student's income being what it was), he had posted a couple of 
signs in the common area offering rides to other homeward-bound students for a 
share in the gas money. He had a few takers, but one by one they had all dropped 
out. The only person he had left was a last minute referral by someone who had 
dropped out. He wasn't even sure of the girl's name, just that she was supposed 
to meet him in front of the dorm at...he glanced at his watch and swore. She was 
supposed to meet him here 20 minutes ago! If he weren't so desperate for someone 
to share the costs, he would have left already. He stamped his feet again, 
breathing on his hands as he impatiently waited.

"Well, if it isn't Doug the Slug," he heard from behind him. He groaned. Only 
one person called him that - Cindy.

He turned, groaning again as he saw her walking along the sidewalk. Cindy was a 
friend of his ex-girlfriend, and had never approved of him as dating material 
for her friend. She was a slightly chunky brunette, who had what Doug used to 
consider a cute face - until he got to know her. He almost laughed when he saw 
her. She was wearing a knee-length skirt and heels, and a light jacket that was 
obviously more for fashion than warmth. Some people just didn't have any sense. 
"Just keep moving," he growled at her.

"Trust me, nothing would make me happier," Cindy replied caustically. "But I'm 
supposed to meet someone here for a ride." Doug looked, and saw that she was 
pulling a suitcase behind her.

Doug closed his eyes, mentally counting to ten. He opened them, and sighed. "Let 
me guess," he said. "Gerald gave your name to someone?"

Cindy nodded, her face puzzled. "Yeah, but how would you know?" She looked at 
him, and his car. "Oh no! Oh no! Not you!" she said, her face screwing up in 
disgust. "It can't be!"

"Yeah," Doug said. "I'm apparently the one you're meeting. I wish Gerald had 
told me it was you!" 

"You don't have to worry, Slug," Cindy said. "I'd rather walk home." She turned, 
and started dragging her suitcase back along the sidewalk.

Doug got in. There was no way he was going anywhere with her, but he did still 
need the money. But, there was nothing to be done. He started the car, and 
prepared to leave when he saw Cindy standing on the sidewalk. She was looking 
around, anxiously. He growled to himself, and slammed the car into park. He 
opened the door, and stood up. "What's wrong?" he asked her.

"Go away," Cindy said, but her voice was anxious.

"Fine!" Doug said, getting back in. He slammed the door shut and started to 
leave when he heard Cindy calling "Wait!" He got back out again. "What is it?" 
he asked her.

Cindy chewed her lip, crossing her arms and glaring at him. "Look, I'm kind 
of..." she hesitated then threw her hands in the air. "I'm stuck!" she said. "I 
don't have a ride. And I don't know anyone else who is heading in my direction."

Doug blinked. "Are you kidding me?" he asked, incredulous. 

Cindy scowled. "I'm not happy about it either. But it looks like I need a ride 
and you're the only one available."

Doug glared at her, torn between leaving her stranded and his need for someone 
to share the costs. Finally, he couldn't simply leave her here. "Okay," he said. 
"But we stop when I say, not you. And you split the cost of gas." He reached 
into the car and popped open the trunk. "And I get to pick the music we listen 
to."

"Fine," Cindy said, bringing her suitcase around and hefting it into the trunk 
next to his own. She partially unzipped it and reached inside to pull out her 
iPod. "But I'm sitting in the back. You don't talk to me, you don't look at me, 
you don't even think about me. As far as you're concerned, I'm not here!"

"Fine!" Doug said. He closed the trunk, and returned to his seat. Cindy opened 
the back door, and flounced into the seat there. She immediately put on her 
iPod, and turned up the music. She leaned her head back against the seat, and 
closed her eyes. Doug adjusted the rear view mirror so that he could still see 
out, but that she wasn't in his view. He turned on the stereo, and turned it up 
loud enough that he couldn't hear her iPod. If it weren't that he knew she was 
there, he could almost believe the car was empty.

He pulled out of the university parking lot, and started the three hour trip 
home. He had been hoping to pass the time talking with whomever was riding with 
him, but that was certainly not going to happen. 

It was almost two hours later when he saw the first snowflake hit his 
windshield. The weather, which had been growing steadily colder all day, had 
finally gotten cold enough to snow. At first it wasn't anything, just light 
flakes. But they grew steadily heavier until it started to get hard to see. 
Before long, there was a light coating on the road. And, it became clear to him 
that he was driving into the storm as the road conditions worsened the further 
he went. It was with clear relief that he pulled off of the highway at his exit. 
As he stopped at the light, he turned down the radio and glanced into the 
backseat.

It was no wonder that Cindy had been so quiet. She appeared to be sound asleep, 
her head lolling gently against the back of the seat.  He hesitated to wake her, 
but he didn't know where she lived. "Hey!" he said, then repeated it louder. 
"HEY!"

Cindy awoke with a start, snorting lightly. She sat up, blinking her eyes. Doug 
saw a moment of panic on her face as she tried to figure out where she was, then 
she spotted him and her features darkened. "I thought I told you not to talk to 
me!" she snarled.

"Sorry to wake you, Princess," he growled back at her. "But you never told me 
where you lived. If you want, I can just drop you off here!"

Cindy blinked again, looking out the window. "We're here?" she asked, 
superfluously. She wiped at the window, clearing some condensation. "Look at the 
snow!"

"Yes, it's snowing," Doug said. "And it's getting deeper by the minute. So if 
you don't mind, where do I go?"

Cindy gave him her address, and Doug snarled again. Of course, it would be 
almost 15 miles out of his way, on unfamiliar back roads that would be hard 
enough to negotiate in the dark and even worse in this weather. Without another 
word, he turned around and waited for the light to turn green. When it did, he 
took off, his wheels spinning in the snow. He swore, and slowed down, waiting 
for his car to get traction. When it did, he moved forward once more, at a much 
slower and more controlled rate.

He was fortunate that there were almost no other cars on the road, as conditions 
were much worse than he had thought from the highway. Apparently, the road crews 
were concentrating on the major thoroughfares and all but ignoring everything 
else. By the time he hit the first of many back roads on the way to Cindy's 
house, the streets were practically untouched. It helped a little as the fresh 
snow gave slightly more traction than it would have had it been  packed by 
drivers, but only a little. He slowed down to little more than 10 miles an hour, 
and carefully negotiated the winding roads. Everything was okay, if a bit slow, 
until he came to a steep hill.

He carefully started down it, putting the car in its lowest gear and using the 
brake sparingly. Even so, the car began picking up speed. If it had been 
straight, he would have been fine, but it had a turn in it halfway down the 
hill. He tapped the brake as he glided into the turn, but the car didn't slow 
down. It started to fishtail, and he fought the wheel to regain control. He 
tapped the brake again, but the car just slid on the fresh snow. It fishtailed 
again, and he turned into the skid but it was too late - the car spun in a 
circle. He heard a scream behind him from Cindy, but he was too busy trying to 
keep on the road to pay her any attention. He felt the wheels bite into the 
shoulder of the road, and then the car lurched with a sickening crunch as the 
tail end slammed into a telephone pole. The car began to spin the other way, but 
no matter how Doug turned the wheel he couldn't straighten it out. With another 
softer crunch, the car spun to a halt, facing the wrong way but on the side of 
the road. 

Doug held onto the steering wheel, breathing hard. He sat there unmoving for a 
few seconds, then took stock. Nothing seemed broken. He let out a long breath, 
then turned to see Cindy holding onto the back of his seat with white-knuckled 
fear. "Are we...are we stopped?" she asked.

"Yes," Doug said. "Are you okay?"

She looked around her, then at him. Before he knew what was happening, she 
started hitting him. "You idiot!" she yelled, her fists flailing. "Why don't you 
watch where you're going? You could have killed us both!"

"Hey!" Doug yelled, blocking most of her hits. "Knock it off! What's the matter 
with you?" Eventually, Cindy stopped hitting him, and sat in her seat, breathing 
hard with her eyes wide. Doug shook his head. He turned back to the front, and 
grabbed the wheel again. He gently gave the car some gas, and wasn't surprised 
when he felt the wheels spin. He hit the wheel with his hand, and tried again. 
The wheels continued to spin. He turned the motor off, and opened the car door. 
"Stay here," he said to Cindy.

He stepped out of the car, and found himself standing in a deep drift, almost up 
to his knees. The drift got deeper the further from the road he got, and he saw 
that the rear wheels were deeply buried. He could dig it out, if he had a 
shovel. He sighed and returned to the car. He reached into his pocket and pulled 
out his cell phone. He groaned when he saw there was no signal.

"I could have told you that," Cindy said. "There's almost no service this far 
out."

"Okay, we're stuck," he said to her. She seemed calmer now, and nodded at him. 
"We'll have to walk from here and find some help."

"Walk?" she said. "Wait a minute...walk where? Never mind...I can't walk." She 
indicated her heels, and her skirt. "I can't go out in this!"

"Hold on," Doug said, reaching down and pressing the button to open the trunk. 
He heard it click, but the trunk didn't open.  He got out again, and went to the 
trunk to open it manually. The key turned, but the trunk didn't open. He pulled 
at it several times, but the damage from striking the telephone pole had jammed 
it. He swore again, and went back to the car. "I can't open the trunk. It's 
stuck," he told Cindy. He took a deep breath. "Okay, we have two choices. We can 
stay here and hope someone comes along, or maybe the snow plows finally arrive. 
Or, I can go for help." He looked at her. "I vote for going for help. It can't 
be more than a mile or more to the next house."

"You're going to leave me?" Cindy said fearfully. 

"Just for a little while," he said. "Until I can come back with help."

"Don't go!" she said, reaching out and grabbing his arm. He pulled himself from 
her grasp, and started to go. "Doug!" she called out, but he closed the door on 
her. He started walking away, but he heard her knocking on the window.

He stopped, and looked back. She had her hand pressed against the car window, 
and a lost look on her face. He sighed, then kicked the snow. "Dammit!" he 
yelled. He stomped back to the car, kicking the snow and swearing. He pulled the 
car door open, and sat down. He turned to Cindy. "Not a word," he told her. "Not 
another word. We'll just sit here until help comes along." He slammed the door 
and sat there with his arms folded.

After a few minutes, Cindy spoke up. "Doug?" she said hesitantly. "Can you turn 
the heater on? It's getting cold."

"No," he said without turning. "The exhaust pipe is buried in the snow. The car 
will fill with carbon monoxide." He turned back. He sat there for a few more 
minutes, until he heard a chattering sound. He turned to see Cindy, in her thin 
jacket, shivering in the cold. Doug grumbled to himself again, then eased over 
the seat. He didn't want to open the car door yet again and spill what was left 
of the heat into the outside air. He slid into the backseat , and fumbled around 
under the passenger seat. "I would get some more clothes from the trunk," he 
said. "But the door is stuck. But, I keep an old blanket under here." He pulled 
it out. It was thin and even ripped in a couple of places, but it was better 
than nothing. He wrapped it around Cindy. She pulled it gratefully around her.

He sat there with her in silence. Cindy huddled under the blanket, but she still 
shivered. He looked at her, then unzipped his coat. When Cindy looked at him in 
question, he told her "Take off your coat."

"Oh, is that what you think is happening here?" Cindy said. "You perverted 
freak! You even breath in my direction and I'll scratch your eyes out!" She held 
up her clawed hand, using the other to clutch the blanket closer to her.

"Don't be stupid," he told her. "You're shivering. We need to use the coats as a 
blanket. I was going to put them together over us, along with the blanket. By 
sharing them, our combined body heat will keep us warmer." He pulled off his 
coat and spread it out over him. Cindy looked at him skeptically, then unwrapped 
the blanket. She unzipped her jacket, and pulled it off. Doug bit his tongue. 
She wasn't even dressed warmly under her jacket. She was wearing a knit top with 
a low neck. He glanced at her full chest before she covered herself with the 
jacket. "Move closer," he told her, holding up his arm. When she looked at him 
skeptically, he shook his head. "Look, you can move closer or you can freeze. 
It's your choice." She bit her lip, but moved under his arm. He joined their two 
coats as best as he could, then covered them with the blanket. He wrapped his 
arm around her, pulling her close to him. In a few minutes, it warmed up and she 
stopped shivering.

"I don't know why you didn't dress more warmly," he said to her.

"If you must know," she said. "I had a date tonight." She tugged on the blanket. 
"I didn't think I'd have time to change once I got home," she explained. "That's 
why I was late. I was changing." She tugged at the blanket again.

"Stop fidgeting," Doug admonished her.

"I'm sorry, but my legs are freezing," Cindy said. Doug looked down to where he 
could see her bare legs sticking out from under the blanket.

"Oh," he said. "Maybe you can tuck them up under the blanket." 

Cindy squirmed in the seat, pulling her legs up. As she did, the jackets and 
blanket shifted, uncovering her. She pulled on them, covering herself back up, 
but her legs stuck out again. "It's no use," she said. "They won't fit."

"Here," Doug said, reaching down and grabbing her calves. He pulled them across 
his lap, tucking the blanket around them. "How's that?"

"Better," Cindy admitted. She leaned up against his side. 

Doug sat there with her again. He looked out the window, watching the snow fall. 
It piled up on the branches of the nearby bushes and trees, and he heard a soft 
whooshing sound as it blew against the car windows. If it weren't for the fact 
that he was stuck in his car on the side of the road, it would be quite 
picturesque. He relaxed, feeling the warmth from Cindy's body soak into his. He 
could feel her bare legs on his thighs, and a slight pressure against his ribs 
from her breasts. As she breathed in and out, they rubbed ever so softly against 
his side, and her breath wafted across his neck. He suddenly realized that he 
was starting to become aroused, and shifted slightly to put a little distance 
between he and Cindy.

After a few long moments, Cindy spoke up. "Doug?" she said.

"Hmm?" he responded. 

"I'm sorry I was such a bitch before," she said. "I know it wasn't your fault 
that we slid off the road. I was just scared."

"I know," he replied.

After a few more minutes, she spoke up again. "Doug?" she said again.

"Yes," he answered.

"I know we're probably going to be just fine," she said, in a small voice. "And 
I know that any minute now someone is going to come along and get us out of 
here." She was quiet a moment. "But I'm still scared."

"It's okay," he murmured. "The worst that can happen is that we have to spend 
the night here. In the morning, someone will come along, or we'll find someone 
to get the car free. There's nothing to worry about."

"I know all of that," she said. "But I'm still scared." She looked up at him. 
"Can you hold me?"

"I am holding you," he said, squeezing her with his arm which was still around 
her.

"Tighter," she said. He squeezed her tighter, and she snuggled closer to him. 
"Tighter," she said again. He reached across, and used his other arm to hold her 
as well. She moved, sliding up until she was sitting in his lap. She leaned 
against him and allowed him to wrap both arms around her, holding her tight. As 
he had noticed before, she was round and soft. Not fat, really, just full 
figured. As she settled into his lap, he could feel his erection growing 
slightly, and hoped that she didn't feel it.

Cindy wrapped her arms around him as well. She squeezed him tightly, her face 
buried into his chest. Unfortunately, Doug's erection didn't care about her 
vulnerability, and just responded to the feeling of her rounded cheeks pressing 
down against it. It continued to respond, slowly growing and pressing up against 
her. Cindy gasped quietly, holding her breath for a moment. She sat perfectly 
still for a moment, and then Doug felt her move her hips a little, pressing them 
slightly downwards. She tilted her face up, staring Doug in the eye for a long 
moment. Then, before either of them knew what was happening, they were kissing.

They kissed each other with a growing passion, holding each other tightly. 
Cindy's mouth opened, and he felt her tongue pressing against his lips. He 
opened his mouth in return, letting her tongue explore his and chasing it back 
into her mouth in return. His hands roamed her back, stroking it and sliding one 
hand under her knit top to caress her bare skin. His other hand slid downwards 
until it encountered her leg under her short skirt. He caressed her bare calf, 
as Cindy squirmed in his lap, her round ass grinding against his hard shaft. 

He slid his hand up along her leg, caressing her thigh until it was stopped by 
her skirt. He continued moving upwards, over her skirt and her knit top until he 
cupped her full breast. She groaned in his mouth as he kneaded her soft flesh 
through her top, and he could feel her nipple harden against his palm. He moved 
both hands to her front, and quickly unbuttoned her top, pulling it open and 
then scooping her large breast from the cup of her bra. Cindy pressed her hand 
against his as he squeezed her tit in his palm, using his finger and thumb to 
tweak her large, stiff nipple. He pulled on it, causing Cindy to gasp. He broke 
off from kissing her and ducked his head, taking her nipple into his mouth. It 
was stiff and hard, and he hammered it with his tongue, which caused Cindy to 
moan softly. 

He slid his hand downwards again, finding and caressing her thigh. He stroked it 
softly as he suckled at her breast, and Cindy reached down and grabbed his 
wrist, drawing his hand upwards. He slid it along her thigh and under her short 
skirt until he could feel the warmth of her pussy. He surprisingly felt her bare 
lips against his fingers, and realized that she wasn't wearing any panties. His 
first thought was of how stupid it was to do in weather like this, but this was 
quickly overridden by the feeling of her warm, wet lips as his fingers pressed 
against them.

Cindy gasped, spreading her legs to allow his fingers access to her wet opening. 
He slid two fingers inside of her, slowly plunging them in and out. He released 
her breast from his lips, and looked up at Cindy. Her eyes glowed with lust, and 
she leaned back on the seat. He pulled his fingers from her opening as she 
reached down. She pulled on her skirt, pulling it up above her hips and exposing 
herself to him. He opened his pants, pulling them down enough so that he could 
free his throbbing erection from his boxers.

Cindy pulled him to her, wrapping her legs around him as he placed himself at 
her entrance. She reached between their bodies, gripping him and guiding him to 
her opening. She looked Doug in the eye as he slid into her. She groaned loudly 
as his thick, hard shaft filled her up. Then she pulled him down, kissing him 
passionately as he began stroking himself in and out of her. He felt her heels 
pressing against the backs of his legs, pulling himself into her on each stroke. 
He reached up, cupping her full breast in his palms and kneading it as he pumped 
himself in and out of her willing body.

Cindy gasped and moaned, her lips alternately seeking his and then laying back 
to moan loudly. Her head tossed back and forth as he slammed himself into her 
again and again. Before long, he felt her hands clutching at his back as her 
heels pulled him into her one last time. Her nails dug into his shirt, squeezing 
him to her as her back arched upwards, thrusting herself towards him. With a 
cry, she climaxed, groaning loudly as her warm pussy walls squeezed his invading 
shaft. She remained that way, with her back arched and her body shaking as her 
climax thrilled her body. With a groan, she relaxed, lying back on the car seat, 
her eyes open and staring at the ceiling.

Doug continued moving, sliding his erect cock in and out of her still spasming 
opening. He released her breast from his hand, and slid it under her to cup the 
rounded, soft cheek of her full ass. He gripped it in his palm, using it to pull 
her up as he pressed downwards. Cindy's eyes focused again, looking at Doug in 
wonder as her body began shivering once more. Biting her lip, she clutched at 
her breasts as he drove himself into her. With another cry, she climaxed once 
more, her body shuddering and shaking in pleasure. 

With another few strokes, Doug joined her. He groaned loudly, thrusting deep 
inside of her as he felt jet after warm jet spew forth, emptying himself inside 
of her warm opening. He groaned again, feeling the last of his semen erupt from 
his cock, before he collapsed panting onto the car seat. 

He lay there with Cindy, both of them hot and sweaty now, the cold of the car 
forgotten. He looked at her, her brunette hair splayed wildly across the seat, 
and her clothing rumpled around her body. She grinned back at him. "I still hate 
you, you know," she said softly, pushing a stray lock of hair off of his face.

"I know," he replied. "I hate you, too." He smiled, and she smiled back at him.


Somebody has to do it!
by A. Bomire

Drindle entered Santa's Workshop #23, just as he did every morning here in 
Santa's Village at the north pole. Well, it read "Workshop #23" over the door, 
but everyone called it "The Lab" because it was where new toy research and 
development was performed. Drindle usually worked in the bicycle division, but 
actually expected to be closing down his section soon. Christmas was just a few 
days away, and all hands were needed in preparation for the big day. Research 
and development could wait for less busy times.

As he entered the doors he was stopped by Harneth, the workshop foreman. 
"Drindle," he said, checking the clipboard he carried. He was never without it, 
and was said to even sleep with it. "You're being reassigned today. Follow me." 
To his surprise, Harneth didn't move towards the workshop doors, but instead 
turned deeper into The Lab. "You're moving from R&D to QA," Harneth replied, 
leading Drindle over to the stairs. Quality Assurance? That usually meant "Toy 
Testing". It wasn't something he had ever done before, and he said so to 
Harneth.

"I know," Harneth replied, as they reached the bottom of the stair. He walked 
down the hallway, to a section that Drindle hadn't ever visited before. "But 
we're short handed right now." He stopped outside of a doorway. "Here we are," 
he said, making a check on his clipboard. "This is a new section, something we 
haven't done before." Before Drindle could ask, he continued. "We've decided to 
branch out a little, making toys for bigger boys and girls."

"Bigger?" Drindle asked, before Harneth could stop him. "What do you mean?"

"Big," Harneth said. "You know - grown up. Adults." He reached for the doorknob.

"I don't understand," Drindle protested. "What kind of toys are there for 
adults? Toys are for children!"

"How should I know?" Harneth said in exasperation. "I just know they need 
testing." He opened the door, showing a small room with a table against the far 
wall. "You and your partner..." He turned a page on his clipboard, then nodded. 
"Maribel, from the doll section..." He lowered his clipboard, and and continued. 
"Will be working here until further notice." He started to walk way.

"But..what am I supposed to do?" Drindle called in confusion.

"I'm sure you'll figure it out," Harneth called over his shoulder. "You're just 
testing toys. How hard can that be?" Before Drindle could question him further, 
he had disappeared back up the stairs.

Drindle looked after him for a few seconds, before shrugging and turning back to 
the room. He entered it, and looked around. On the table was a clipboard, 
resting next to the outlet from a chute that protruded from the wall. He walked 
over to the table and studied the clipboard. It appeared to be a check-off list, 
with various categories and rankings from one to ten. "Hmm," Drindle mused, 
reading the categories. "Usability, comfort, realism..." He was interrupted by a 
sound from behind him.

"Are you Drindle?" he heard from the doorway. He turned, and saw another elf 
whom he supposed must be Mirabel. She was about his same height, which was true 
of just about every elf he had ever met, with blond hair that she wore short, 
around her ears. She was slim, although in truth he'd never seen a fat elf 
either. She was dressed like him in a green tunic with red leggings. She looked 
at him, puzzled, and he realized that she was waiting for him to answer.

"Oh, yes," he said. "I'm Drindle. Are you Maribel?" He crossed the room, holding 
out his hand. She nodded, taking his hand briefly. "So, I suppose we should get 
started. What do we do first?"

"You mean, you don't know?" she asked in surprise. "I was just transferred here 
from Dolls. I was hoping you knew what we were supposed to be doing."

Drindle shook his head. "Sorry, I just came from Bicycles," he replied. He 
sighed. "I guess we'll have to just wing it." He showed her the clipboard. "I 
think we're supposed to rank the toys according to these categories, but I don't 
know what toys we are testing."

Maribel took the clipboard from him, studying it thoughtfully. As she did, a 
buzzer sounded and they both heard a rattling sound in the chute. They turned to 
the table to see a small box tumble out. It came to rest with the label facing 
them, and Drindle could see "Test Product #1: Realistic, Latex model". That was 
certainly an odd sounding toy. He glanced at Maribel and went over to the table. 
He turned the box right-side up and opened it. There were some styrofoam packing 
peanuts inside, and he reached into them, grasping something long and 
cylindrical. He pulled it out, and gasped. Hearing him, Maribel looked up from 
the clipboard, and gasped as well. It was a dildo!

Drindle had heard of them, although it wasn't something he'd ever have expected 
to see. It was between  7 and 8 inches in length, and modeled after a male 
penis, with latex ridges and veins, and was even colored similar to flesh toned. 
That certainly explained the "realistic" label, and it was made of some sort of 
latex. It flexed slightly in his hand as he gaped at it, and he dropped it on 
the table, backing away and looking at Maribel.

"That can't...I mean, we aren't..." she stammered, flushing and looking between 
Drindle and the dildo on the table. "They don't mean we're supposed to 
test...that!"

Drindle shrugged, staring at the table. "I guess so," he said, still shocked 
himself. "Harneth did mention that we were testing toys for adults. I just never 
presumed it would be anything like that!" They both stood and stared at the 
dildo for a few moments, until Drindle turned to Maribel. "Well, go ahead..test 
it."

She gaped at him. "What? I'm not going anywhere near that!"

"Well, you certainly don't expect ME to test it, do you?" Drindle responded.

Maribel glared at him for a long minute. "Fine!" she said, huffily. She tossed 
him the clipboard, and grabbed the dildo from the table. "Okay - realistic? 
Check. Comfort? Check. Usability? Check." She tossed the dildo onto the table. 
"There..all tested. Did you write that down?"

Drindle sighed. "We're supposed to rank the categories," he said, reading the 
chart. "So..on a scale of 1 to 10, how realistic do you think it is?" He looked 
at her expectantly, holding the chart.

"I don't know...5?" she replied.

"Mm hmm," Drindle murmured, making a note. "And comfort?"

"Uh...5?" Mirabel said again.

Drindle looked at her. "We can't just make it up!" he said in exasperation. 
"We've got a job to do! They're expecting us to test these..uh, toys."

Mirabel looked at the dildo again. "Fine, then," she said. "You fill out the 
categories. How realistic do you think it is?"

Drindle walked over to the table and studied the dildo. "Well," he said 
pensively. "As far as shape and texture, it looks okay. For size, it isn't very 
much bigger than normal."

Maribel snickered. "In your dreams," she said. She glanced at the dildo. "It 
looks pretty big to me."

Drindle shrugged. "I guess you're the expert," he replied. "I've only had 
experience with my own."

Maribel glanced downwards towards Drindle's crotch, before hastily looking up 
again. "I'm not an expert," she said defensively. "I've..uh..seen a couple," she 
said, blushing slightly. Drindle wisely didn't say anything. 
"Anyway..realistic...let's put down 8?"

Drindle started to mark it down, then stopped. "But that only covers the look," 
he said. "What about feel?" Maribel frowned, and Drindle looked at her 
sympathetically, understanding how uncomfortable this must be for her. For her? 
Heck, it was pretty uncomfortable for him as well! But, the job needed to be 
done. "Maribel," he started, in a patient tone. "Let's be honest. This is 
something obviously designed for a woman, so it would be best tested by a woman. 
That's why you were brought here. It has to be you who tests it."

"Oh..all right!" Maribel replied. She picked up the dildo again, holding it in 
her hands. In her small, delicate hands it did look very large. Maribel turned 
it over, studying it closely. She began running her hands over the surface, 
feeling it. It almost seemed as if she were stroking it, and despite himself 
Drindle started getting aroused. He hastily lowered the clipboard so that his 
growing bulge wouldn't be noticeable. "Its surface seems realistic enough," 
Maribel remarked, as she ran a finger over one of the bulging veins. She 
squeezed the dildo in her hands, massaging it. "It feels very hard, much like 
the real thing as well," she said. "But obviously the real thing is much warmer. 
This is cold." She continued stroking it. "Although I wonder if it warms up with 
continued use?" She began rubbing it faster, stroking it with a twisting motion. 
"Friction does warm it up some," she commented. "I wonder..."

Drindle gasped in spite of himself when Maribel opened her mouth, and stuck the 
end of the dildo inside. She closed her eyes, carefully pushing more and more of 
the toy into her warm mouth. She pulled it out, and Drindle could see her saliva 
coating its latex surface. She licked up a few stray drops running down its 
side, then inserted it into her mouth once more. She continued pumping it in and 
out for a few seconds, then pulled it out and studied it again. "Well," she 
said, breathing a little heavy. "That warmed up the tip." She stroked her hands 
over it again, spreading her saliva over the slick surface. She looked at 
Drindle, who was just staring at her, his eyes wide. "Aren't you going to write 
any of this down?"

"Huh? What?" Drindle said dazedly. He shook his head. "Oh, yeah," he replied, 
flustered. "Right...uh, hard, cold, warms up when you lick it." He nodded. "Got 
it."

"Well, write it down," Maribel said exasperatedly. Drindle was still holding the 
clipboard in front of him, having grown very hard as he watched Maribel lick the 
dildo. He gulped under her gaze, and raised the clipboard to begin writing. He 
hurriedly jotted down notes, and turned to look back at Maribel. She was staring 
at his crotch, her hand moving absently over the dildo. He glanced down, and saw 
that his cock was pressing strongly against his leggings. They were very warm, 
and the standard uniform for elves here at Santa's Village, but they left very 
little to the imagination, especially in situations like this. He gulped, and 
lowered the clipboard again. Maribel look up at him with something odd in her 
eyes. The corners of her mouth twitched, but she didn't say anything.

Drindle quickly indicated the clipboard. "You might as well get on with it," he 
said. "You still need to test comfort and usability."

Maribel looked at the dildo. "Well, I guess that means I'll actually have to use 
it," she said, with much less resistance than earlier. She reached for the 
waistband on her leggings, then stopped and looked at Drindle. "But if I'm going 
bottomless, then so are you!"

"What? Why?" he asked, puzzled.

"Because it's only fair," she said. She reached for her waistband, pausing as 
she looked at him.

"Oh, all right," he replied. He sat the clipboard on the table, and winced when 
he saw Maribel's eyes latch onto his crotch once more. He resignedly reached for 
the waistband of his leggings, and tugged them down. Despite his embarrassment, 
he was still turned on from watching Maribel, and his erection popped up when 
freed from confinement, slapping against him before lowering to point outward 
towards Maribel. As she stared at it, it grew even harder, bobbing slightly to 
the beat of his pulse.

Maribel approached him, holding the dildo in her hands. "You were right," she 
breathed. "Yours is almost as big."

"Told you," Drindle said with pride. He gasped as she reached out, gripping his 
shaft in her hand. She stroked it, causing him to moan lightly. She glanced up 
at him, then traced his member with her fingers, lightly stroking it.

She smiled. "Well, I'd say that the two feel remarkably similar," she said. 
"With the exception that yours feels more..well, alive is the only way to put 
it." She stroked it couple of more times, then backed away, grinning at 
Drindle's look of frustration. "What? Did you expect more? We're working, 
remember?"

Drindle grumbled, then indicated her leggings. "You're just stalling," he said.

Maribel flushed, but she had no choice but to remove her own leggings. She 
turned around, facing away from Drindle. While she meant to save herself some 
embarrassment in disrobing in front of him, she actually gave him quite a good 
look at her ass as she pulled her leggings down. Like the rest of her, it was 
petite, but very tight. It appeared very firm, and he felt an urge to reach out 
and squeeze it. "Wow! You've got a nice ass!" Drindle remarked, almost before he 
could stop himself.

"Hey! That's none of your..." Maribel said, standing up and putting her hands 
behind her to cover herself. "Really? You think so?" She looked back at him, 
smiling slightly, then she shook her head, frowning. "Look, keep your mind on 
the job!" She sounded angry, but Drindle could tell she was pleased.

She stepped out of her leggings, kicking them to the side, then turned around. 
She tugged on the bottom of her tunic, trying to cover as much of herself as she 
could. Drindle admired her smooth legs, and could catch glimpses of her downy 
covered mound as she shuffled around, but he didn't say anything. Maribel picked 
up the dildo, and turned away from him again. "Okay," she said, "I'm going to 
test it now." From behind, he could see her lower the dildo. He watched her 
squirm around for a moment, before spreading her legs slightly. From behind, he 
could see the dildo appear between her legs, and she pressed it upwards. She 
grunted, removing the dildo then pushing it upwards again. She wriggled it a 
bit, then removed it. He heard her mutter "Dammit!"

"What's the matter?" Drindle asked.

"I can't..." Maribel started, before sighing. "I can't get it..you know...in!"

Drindle moved towards her. "Here, let me help," he offered.

"Yeah, right," Maribel said with a harsh laugh. "Like that's going to happen!" 
She struggled with the dildo for a few more moments, then turned and threw it at 
him. "Oh, go ahead!" she said resignedly. "But no funny stuff!"

Drindle picked up the dildo from the floor, and approached Maribel with it. She 
refused to turn to face him, so he reached down and guided it up between her 
legs from behind. She gasped as his fingers brushed against her thighs, but she 
didn't say anything. He knelt on the floor, and slowly moved the dildo up 
towards where he could see her down-covered mound. He guided the head to her 
opening, and Maribel sucked in a breath as he pressed it against her. He tried 
to insert it, but her legs were too close together, and it was obvious that 
Maribel wasn't cooperating.

"You need to relax," he murmured. He placed his hand on her thigh, causing 
Maribel to jump. He stroked her soft skin, pressing outward slightly. He could 
feel the tension in her legs, but as he softly massaged her thighs she relaxed, 
finally allowing him to gently spread her legs. As she did, he could see her 
mound open slightly. He reached up, brushing it with his finger.

"Hey!" Maribel started to object, but she kept quiet as he ran his finger over 
her mound. He felt her quiver beneath his touch, and he stroked her softly and 
slowly. He heard her sigh, and used that as an invitation to continue. He gently 
spread her soft lips, sliding his finger between them. He could feel her opening 
growing damp, and he spread the juices with his finger. He slid it upwards until 
he found her stiffening clit, and he massaged it, causing Maribel to gasp. Her 
legs spread wider of their own accord, giving him further access. 

"Here," he said, rising from his knees. As he did, his erection brushed against 
her hip, and Maribel reached back briefly to stroke his hard shaft. He led her 
to the table, and had her rest her elbows on the table's surface. When he knelt 
behind her again, she spread her legs wide, opening herself up to him. He could 
hear her heavy breathing, and he could smell her arousal. He leaned in, pressing 
forward until he could slide his tongue along her damp slit. Maribel groaned 
loudly as he stroked her pussy with his tongue. Her juices flowed freely now, 
indicating her arousal, and he eagerly lapped them up. He reached around, 
stroking her clit with his finger as he lapped at her wet opening. When he 
leaned back and wiped his lips, Maribel looked at him in disappointment.

"What? Did you expect more?" he said, echoing her earlier statement to him. He 
grinned, and brought the dildo up. This time, when he pressed it against her 
opening, it slid inside easily. Maribel moaned loudly as he pressed it into her, 
sliding it in until his hand rested against her hot opening. "How does that 
feel?" he asked her, as he gently moved it about inside of her, turning and 
twisting it.

"Oh god, that feels good!" Maribel moaned. She ground her hips against his hand.

"I meant, on a scale of 1 to 10," Drindle reminded her.

"Huh?" Maribel replied. "Oh, yeah, the test," she said dazedly. "Uh..I don't 
know for sure yet," she said. "Try it a few more times!"

Drindle chuckled. "Okay," he replied. He pulled the dildo out of her, and slid 
it back in. Maribel sighed in pleasure as he began fucking the latex object in 
and out of her, and she moved in time to his strokes. He pulled the dildo from 
her opening, and stood up.

"Hey!" Maribel protested. "What are you doing?"

"I've got another idea on testing this," he said. He grabbed his cock, which was 
so hard that it almost hurt. "Let's do a comparison test." 

"Wha..?" Maribel started to ask, until Drindle rubbed the head of his shaft 
against her opening. Maribel looked back at him, her eyes wide, but she didn't 
stop him as he slid his cock into her. "Oh...yeah," Maribel sighed. "That's 
good!" He began pumping in and out of her hot opening, and Maribel groaned in 
time to his thrusts.

"Last test," Drindle said. He pulled out of her, and Maribel reached for him. 
"No wait.." he said, putting her off. "This time, you tell me if I'm using the 
dildo or the real thing." He slid the dildo inside of her.

"Ohhh...dildo," Maribel said.

"Good," Drindle remarked. He pulled it out, then slid his own shaft into her.

"Aaah...real!" Maribel replied.

"Good!" Drindle said. He began alternately fucking her warm pussy with the 
dildo, and his cock, and Maribel called out "real" or "dildo" each time. 
Eventually, she stopped answering, and just groaned in time to his thrusts, no 
matter which object he was using. Her panting and moaning grew louder and 
louder, and when he started to pull his cock out of her to replace it with the 
dildo, she reached back and grabbed his hand.

"No!" she breathed. "No more tests! Just fuck me, dammit! Fuck me!" 

Drindle dropped the dildo onto the table, and gripped her hips. He slammed 
himself into her, and Maribel enthusiastically pressed back against him. She 
groaned loudly. "That's it..I'm almost there..." she panted. "Oh yes! Yes!" She 
arched her back, moaning in pleasure. "I'm coming! I'm coming!" He felt her 
pussy clamp down on his pistoning shaft, and she shuddered in climax. He held 
onto her hips, thrusting over and over into her through her orgasm, until she 
collapsed shuddering onto the table, panting and gasping for breath. 

Reluctantly, he pulled out of her, his member still hard and throbbing, and 
coated with her juices. Maribel looked at him with a dreamy expression, her 
short blond hair plastered to her forehead by her sweat. Her eyes traveled 
downwards until they latched onto his erection, and then they widened. She sat 
up suddenly, turning and grabbing his erection. She sank to her knees and 
plunged her mouth over his shaft. Like an elf possessed, she began bobbing her 
head up and down his thick member, her hands gripping his shaft and stroking it. 
Drindle reached down, cupping her head in his hands. "Oh Maribel!" he groaned. 
"Just a little more...just a little...I'm going to come!" he warned her. Maribel 
wrapped her delicate lips around the tip of his shaft, and continued stroking it 
with her hands. With a groan, Drindle erupted in her mouth. He couldn't remember 
the last time he had come this hard, and he shot forth jet after hot, steamy jet 
into her mouth. Maribel tried her best, but she couldn't keep up with it and 
some dribbled out of her mouth and down her chin. 

When Drindle was finally empty, he sank back to rest against the table. Maribel 
allowed his dwindling erection to slip from her lips. She scooped up the drips 
of his semen that were running down her chin, and lustily slurped them from her 
fingers, swallowing it with a  satisfied expression. She stood up and leaned 
against the table with Drindle.

The two of them just relaxed for a few moments, allowing themselves to recover. 
Then Maribel reached for the clipboard, lying forgotten next to the dildo. She 
started making marks on the chart. "I'd say," she said as she continued grading. 
"That as a substitute for the real thing, this toy did a remarkably good job." 
She reached down, patting Drindle's still semi-hard member. "But that I still 
prefer the real thing by far!" She turned, placing the dildo and the completed 
form back into the box that rested on the table. As she did, Drindle reached 
down, cupping her tight ass in his palm and squeezing it. She giggled as she 
closed up box and placing it back in the chute. 

A few moments later, the box was sucked back up to wherever it had come, leaving 
Drindle and Maribel alone in the room. Drindle smiled at her. "Well, I'd say 
that was a successful test," he said. Maribel giggled again. Before she could 
reply, a buzzer sounded, the chute began rattling and shaking, and another box 
was disgorged onto the table.

Maribel looked at it, then at Drindle. She grinned, and eagerly reached for the 
box. She opened it, and pulled out a long piece of string, with small beads 
along its length. She frowned, puzzled as to its use, then looked in the box. 
She pulled out another form to be filled out in testing, as Drindle read the 
label on the side of the box. "Anal beads," he read. 

Maribel looked up sharply, then looked down at the string of beads. Her eyes 
narrowed, and she gave Drindle a smoky look. "Well," she said. "I guess we'll 
have to test them." 

Drindle, his cock already starting to harden, moved over to her. "It's a tough 
job," he said. "But somebody has to do it!"


Reindeer Games
By Purple Dragon

As I started the car and pulled out of the driveway I asked, "So, any more 
little surprises I should know about?"

"I'm not saying anything," she said with a smile.  Then she added, "But if you 
liked that, just wait until Christmas."

I remember that conversation well and thought about it often during the couple 
of weeks after the Halloween party.  True to her word, my wife would tell me 
nothing about the upcoming surprise, and I soon stopped asking, finally all but 
forgetting about the whole thing.

I did get the story about how she had met Victoria out of her.  It seems that 
all those nights of me working late did indeed raise her suspicions.  One day 
she boldly walked into Victoria's office and asked if she had been fucking me.  
She tells me that Victoria looked her right in the eye and said, "No, but I'd 
sure like to."  She says that the frank admission of Victoria's desires, more 
than anything else, convinced her that nothing was going on.  Victoria asked her 
out to lunch and for some reason, she accepted.  Over lunch something happened 
that neither of them expected.  They became friends.

Without my knowledge, the two of them met for lunch a couple of times a week.  
It was about two weeks later that the subject of the three of us getting 
together was broached.  I was more than a little surprised to learn that it was 
my wife that made the suggestion, although Victoria was the one who came up with 
the idea of the costume party and the rest of the details.

In the weeks following the party I occasionally joined the two of them for 
lunch, but there was never a repeat of that evening's festivities and I resigned 
myself to the idea that it had been just a one-time thing.  Although I have to 
admit that my sex life with my wife, which had been pretty damn good to begin 
with, stepped up a notch or two after that.

As Christmas approached, my wife began to talk about Victoria's work with local 
charities and started hinting that it would be nice if we could help her out.  I 
was more than willing, and a bit confused as to why she thought I might ned so 
much convincing.  Well, I soon found out why.  Evidently, the 'help' that 
Victoria needed involved me dressing up like Santa Claus for three local 
orphanages that she supported.  I can't say that the idea of dressing up like 
the man in red thrilled me, but what kind of jerk would I be if I refused to 
help out kids that had so little.

To make a long story short, Christmas Eve found Victoria picking up the two of 
use, dressed as Santa and Mrs. Claus, and driving us to the first of our three 
stops.  Victoria, for her part, was getting into the spirit as well.  She was 
dressed like Rudolph, complete with antlers and shinny red nose.

I entered the first place with a hearty "Ho, Ho, Ho!" and the bright faces and 
accompanying squeals of delight from the gathered children made my discomfort 
worth every second.  We made the rounds, and I watched Victoria as she played 
with the kids.  Here was a woman who was worth several million dollars, dressed 
in a heavy fur costume that was probably nice outside, but which must be 
sweltering in here, rolling around on the ground with a group of laughing 
children who could give her nothing in return.  Just donating her money would 
have been more than most people would expect, but adding her time like this was 
above and beyond the call of duty, and, as corny as it sounds, it made me proud 
to know her.

The time soon came for the main event and the kids lined up to sit on Santa's 
lap and tell me what they wanted for Christmas.  I remember thinking that this 
was a bad idea since, unlike the 'real' Santa, I had no special magic to produce 
those gifts, but I didn't really have a say in the matter.  The first kid was a 
sprightly little six-ish year old named Maggie.  She told me that if is wasn't 
too much trouble (I almost choked up right there) she would like a doll.  She 
even told me the name of the exact one that she wanted.  I felt crappy that I 
had to disappoint her.  I'm sure that dolls were present in the bags of gifts 
that we had brought, but what are the odds that she would get the exact one she 
wanted?

I turned to my left, where Victoria was holding out a wrapped gift.  I took it 
and handed it to Maggie and heard Victoria say, "Go ahead and open it dear."  I 
held my breath as she tore the wrapping off and let out an ear-piercing squeal 
when she saw what she had received.  It was the exact doll that she had asked me 
for.  I gave Victoria a surprised look and she just winked back at me.  As kid 
after kid sat on my lap, told me what they wanted, and then received that exact 
item, I was starting to believe that I might have some of that Christmas magic 
after all.  It was only later that I found out that magic had nothing to do with 
it.  Victoria had been in contact with the people who ran the orphanage and had 
the kids write letters to Santa, asking for the one thing they wanted more than 
anything else.  She had then simply gone out and bought the correct gifts.  My 
admiration of her increased even more.

The scene was repeated almost exactly at our next two stops.  Overall, it went 
better than I had anticipated.  With well over a hundred kids between the three 
stops, there had only been a handful of criers, a couple of screamers, and one 
wetter (luckily toward the end of the night).  By the end we were all a bit 
tired, but also exhilarated, and when Victoria invited us back to her house we 
readily agreed.

She showed us into the lounge, which was much more cozily decorated than the 
last time we had seen it, with a huge Christmas tree in the corner and holly and 
candles everywhere.  Victoria said that she was going to change, and when I 
mentioned my own desire to get out of these clothes she gave me a mischievous 
grin and said, "soon enough, but leave them on a little longer.  I have one more 
surprise for tonight." It was only then that I remembered my wife's promise, and 
my cock twitched in anticipation. 

"What are you two up to?" I asked my wife.

"You'll see," she said with an equally wicked grin and came over to sit beside 
me on a little love seat.

We didn't have long to wait, and less than five minutes later the door opened 
and Victoria came back into the room.  She was still dressed as Rudolph, but 
this was definitely the R-rated version of the costume.  Gone was the bulky fur 
outfit that she had been wearing all night.  It was replaced by a brown, 
skintight bodysuit, and although it covered her from neck to foot, it left 
absolutely nothing to the imagination.  It hugged every curve from her huge 
breasts, to her long legs, to her plump ass complete with a little tail just 
above it.

She took my breath away, and before I could get it back there followed on her 
heels an even bigger surprise.  As she entered the room I noticed that she was 
holding a brown leather belt in each hand that stretched out behind her and was 
held by a pair of women following her.  But the procession wasn't over yet as 
three more pairs of ladies followed the group in and I realized that it was my 
reindeer, all eight of them, with Rudolph leading the way.

They were all dressed the same as Victoria with one major difference.  Their 
suits had been cut away where they should have covered their breasts, leaving 
them all completely bare.  As the initial shock wore off, another took its place 
as I noticed that each pair of women appeared to be twins.  Blonde hair, black, 
brown, and red in that order followed Victoria as she trotted around the room, 
giving me a good chance to enjoy the show.  Eight pairs of unencumbered tits 
bounced and swayed with every step and I noticed that their size decreased 
steadily from the front of the line, where Victoria's massive breasts swayed 
almost as much in spite of her clothes, to the rear, where the two redheads had 
not much more than a handful.

I glanced at my wife, who was also watching the show and her eyes moved to mine 
as she smiled at me.  We both turned back and watched as Victoria led the group 
around the room one more time and then came to a stop in front of us.  Her smile 
was ear to ear as she said, "reindeer reporting for duty Santa."

I stood up and tried to wipe the goofy grin off my face and replace it with a 
stern look.  Standing in front of them, I stared at my 'team' and asked, 
"everyone ready for the big night?"  To which I received a unanimous, "Yes 
Santa."  I walked down the line like a general reviewing the troops, reaching 
out to brush a cheek here, a breast there, an ass back over there.  "Everyone 
certainly looks fit, but maybe it would be a good idea to warm up a bit.  
Rudolph, unharness the team and have them line up."

The 'unharnessing' consisted of the girls simply dropping the long leather belt 
that they had been holding, and Victoria reeling it in to drop it over by the 
wall.  The girls then lined up facing me in the order they had been in line, 
with Victoria on the left, and the rest down the line to the right.  "Ok, let's 
start with some jumping jacks to get the blood flowing."  Have you ever watched 
a girl do jumping jacks?  If so, was she topless at the time?  No?  Well, let me 
tell you that her breasts do some really incredible things as she jumps up and 
down and having the nine of them doing it a couple of feet away from me was a 
sight to behold.  Of course, I also understand that it can be a bit 
uncomfortable, which I suppose is why women usually wear some kind of sports bra 
in such situations.  I didn't want to start them out on the wrong foot, so I 
quickly let them stop.  Besides, I don't know about them, but I do know that my 
blood was flowing quite nicely by that point.

"Time to stretch out a little.  Everyone bend and touch your toes.  Good, and 
now up, and reach for the sky.  And bend, and up, and bend, and up."  As they 
continued the exercise I moved around behind the group, admiring nine lovely 
asses that looked like they were positively ready to pop right through the suits 
that they were wearing.  When I had made my way all the way down the line and 
was standing directly behind Victoria I said, "and bend, and hold that 
position."  I looked over their backs to my wife, who was still sitting on the 
loveseat, and smiled at her.

I reached down and ran my hands over Victoria's ass, "Very nice Rudolph, you've 
been working out lately haven't you?"

"Yes Santa, thank you for noticing."

"How could I not my dear?"  I moved to the next pair in line, the blondes, and 
placed one hand on each of their butts.  Theirs were a bit larger than 
Victoria's.  More rounded, softer, and my cock twitched at the thought of 
pushing against those cushions.  "Dasher, Dancer, also very nice."

"Thank you Santa," they said in unison.  

I repeated the procedure on the other three pairs of girls.  Prancer and Vixen's 
were not quite as big as the others, but still very nice.  Comet and Cupid had 
firm little heart shaped asses, and Donder and Blitzen, who were more petite 
than the other girls overall, had the cutest, tightest little butts that I had 
ever seen and felt.  Whatever your taste, there was a pair of asses and tits to 
go along with it.  Victoria certainly seemed to have gone to a lot of trouble to 
set this up.

I noticed something else in my inspection.  The panty area of the costumes 
seemed to be a separate piece of material.  It could have just been added 
protection, coving a normal bodysuit, but if I knew Victoria, what it covered 
was quite a bit less than that.  I wondered just how far these girls were 
willing to go with this.  Well, we'll find out soon enough.  "You can all stand 
up now."

I walked around in front of Victoria and looked closely at her suit.  I hadn't 
noticed it before, but hers was evidently identical to the others, she just 
hadn't removed the piece of material that covered her breasts.  It was kind of 
like a strapless bra that wrapped around her body and hooked in the back.  
Without asking for permission I unhooked and watched as the force of her tits 
being released whipped it across the room.  She was smiling as I looked up at 
her "I wondered how long it would take you to discover that Santa."

Smiling back I said, "I've discovered something else as well."  Reaching down to 
her sides I undid the panties, that turned out to be held together with just 
velcro, and quickly jerked them down and out between her legs.  As I suspected, 
the crotch of the suit was nonexistent, and showed Victoria's already moist lips 
peeking out from between her red curls.  She got a slightly startled look on her 
face at my abrupt action and I smiled to myself that I had been able to surprise 
her.

"Ok reindeer," I said to the others.  "Please follow Rudolph's lead and see that 
you are similarly attired."  I stepped back and watched as the other eight girls 
removed their 'panties' and I was in for yet another surprise as eight pretty 
pussies came into view.  In each case, the hair had been trimmed close and then 
shaved to form the first initial of the girl's reindeer name.  I actually 
laughed when I saw it in spite of myself, and wondered just how much one had to 
pay a girl to get her to do something like that.  In addition, in every case the 
shaved initial was exactly the same color as the hair on the girl's head.  Yep, 
Victoria had certainly done her research on this one.  And knowing her, it was 
probably research that she greatly enjoyed.

"Now, pair off for 69 drill."  Comet and Cupid were the first to get the point 
and dropped to the ground where they were, each one sliding her head between the 
legs of her sister.  Comet was on top, and Cupid - no, wait, maybe that was 
Cupid on top.  Oh hell, it doesn't matter.  It was a sight to behold either way.  
The rest of the girls were only a beat behind the pair and each teamed up with 
her sister to make four pairs of licking, sucking, moaning, writhing girls on 
their own little section of floor.

Of course, this meant that Victoria had been left out in the cold, which is just 
what I had been hoping for.  Turning to her I said, "Poor Rudolph.  Are the 
others still not letting you join in their games?"

"Oh yes Santa, they do, but it appears that everyone is busy at the moment," she 
replied with disappointed pout.

"Well," I said, looking over at my wife, who was still sitting on the loveseat.  
"Maybe if you were to ask Mrs. Claus very nicely, she would help you out."

Victoria actually dropped to her knees in front of her and pleaded, "Oh please 
Mrs. Claus, please won't you help me?"

"Of course I will," she said.  "Now you just lie down there and let me take care 
of everything."

Victoria did as she asked, and I watched as my wife crawled between her legs to 
see to her needs.  As she added the sounds of her own oral ministrations to the 
already noisy room I looked around and realized that we were the only two still 
fully dressed.  Well, we couldn't have that so I crept up behind her, reached 
around her waist to undo her pants and started pulling them down.  She helped me 
out by lifting her legs, one at a time, to let me get them all the way off.  
There she was, the wholesome image of Mother Christmas from the waist up, and 
completely naked from there down.  Well, ok, that wholesome image thing doesn't 
usually include lapping at another woman's cunt, but shit happens.

I took off my boots and got rid of my own trousers, also taking the time to rid 
myself of some of the extra padding that gave credence to my Santa costume.  I 
stood there, as naked as my wife from the waist down, my throbbing cock giving 
testimony to the effect that 10 mostly naked women can have on it.  I saw a few 
of the girls raise their eyes from their work to check out the situation.  I 
wondered how many of these beauties I would have to chance to go at by the end 
of the night, but for the first course, I kneeled behind my wife's cute rear 
end, which was wiggling back and fourth as she tried to get into a hard to reach 
place.  I reached down and slipped a finger inside her pussy, finding, as I had 
expected, that she was as wet as I have ever felt her.  Wasting no more time, I 
replaced my finger with my cock and pressed it home in one smooth motion.  She 
raised her head and moaned once at the sudden intrusion, but then dropped back 
down to her work.

As I set a slow, even pace, I kept part of my attention on the rest of the room.  
I was looking down over my wife's body, admiring the sight of Victoria's slowly 
swaying tits responding to the gentle thrusts that I was giving my wife, when I 
heard a louder than normal noise from my right.  I looked over in time to see 
Comet, or was it Cupid, shuddering as she came under the tongue of her sister, 
who was only a blink behind her in her climax.  This set off a cascade of moans, 
cries, grunts, and screams from the other, as if this were a signal that they 
had been waiting for.  As each couple finished, they rose to their feet, and 
came to stand by us, until eventually, all eight were gathered around us in a 
circle, looking down as if trying to decide which would be the next to come.

They didn't have to wonder for long as Victoria reached up and grabbed her tits, 
pinching her nipples as she began to cry out in her own ecstasy.  When she was 
done, she crawled out from beneath us and joined the rest of the girls standing 
around.  In spite of the slow pace I was setting, I could feel my own orgasm 
approaching, and now that her work had been successfully completed, my wife had 
taken it upon herself to start thrusting back at me with every stroke.  I barely 
noticed when Victoria quietly walked around the group, whispering something in 
each girl's ear before moving on to the next.

I suddenly felt a pair of hands on each of my shoulders and looked up to see the 
raven haired beauties smiling at me as they gently, but firmly, tried to pull me 
back.  I thought about resisting, but curiosity got the better of me and I 
allowed myself to be pulled away.  As I pulled back, the blondes and redheads 
went to my wife and pulled her to her knees.  They stripped away the rest of her 
clothing as my own pair of assistants helped me out of mine leaving, I noticed, 
just my hat and beard.  When we were both naked, my wife's helpers turned her 
over to lie on her back on the floor, then two got on each side, and at a silent 
command, they lifted her off the floor.  They swung her around until her head 
was toward me and moved in close.  As she let her head fall back, she found my 
stiff member at the perfect level and sucked it into her mouth.  As the four 
girls held her, the two unoccupied ones took up position at her sides and began 
massaging her breasts and I could feel the hands of my own helpers roaming over 
my chest, back, and ass.

My wife is a very, very good cocksucker, and the presence of nine other girls 
helping out all but insured that this would be one of her fastest performances 
to date.  I tried to think of something else to stave off the inevitable, but 
the sight of so many tits and pussys and asses all around me was making it 
nearly impossible.  Closing my eyes didn't even help since that only made the 
sensations of four hands and one very talented mouth all the more apparent.  
Despite my best efforts, I was right on the brink, and just when I knew that I 
couldn't hold out any longer, the four girls holding my wife pulled her back and 
off my cock.

They swung her around until she faced me and started moving toward us.  As they 
approached, the two holding her legs spread them apart and adjusted her height 
until her, now even wetter, pussy was level with my cock.  I was just reaching 
down to grab it and guide it inside her when I felt the hand on one of my 
helpers reach out to do it for me.  I didn't even have to move as the four that 
held my wife paused to make sure everything was lined up correctly and then 
continued forward to impale her on my painfully erect member.

I stared to thrust forward, but the hands of the girls held my hips, stopping 
the motion.  Then I felt someone reach between my legs and grab my balls and I 
looked over to see Victoria's smiling face.  The girls holding my wife pulled 
her back until all but an inch of my cock was outside and then they pushed her 
back on.  They repeated this, setting the pace, and soon my own helpers were 
pushing my own hips forward to meet them on every stroke.

It's hard to explain what all this felt like.  It was like we were two sex dolls 
that these girls were using to demonstrate fucking techniques.  I had no control 
over the situation, every motion was dictated by others, and yet I was 
exquisitely aware of every sensation.  I looked steadily down at my wife, who 
spared me an occasional smile, but most of the time just lay back, her mouth 
open is a perpetual moan, her eyes rolled back in her head as she enjoyed the 
sensations every bit as much as I. 

She had already come at least once and was just starting again when my own 
orgasm finally overtook me.  The girls seemed completely in tune with our bodies 
and knew the exact moment because they pushed us together so hard that I was 
afraid I would shoot out the back.  Then they raised her body until her tits 
were pressed against my chest and our lips met in a kiss that expressed all our 
love as well as the pent up sexual tension that was now being so completely 
released.

Luckily they didn't release her as I'm not sure that I had the strength to stand 
myself unaided, much less hold her up.  As the tension slowly ebbed from our 
bodies, they gently lowered us to the ground, and joined us there.  Every one of 
us was breathing deeply from the experience that we had just shared and as 
strength returned, we began to look around at one another, curious as to what 
would happen next.

Well, a lot did.  None of us ended up leaving Victoria's house that night, and 
no one left unsatisfied.  When my wife and I awoke, very late the next morning, 
the "reindeer" were gone.  We never saw any of them again, but over a late 
brunch with Victoria, we all agreed that we shouldn't wait so long to do 
something like this again.  Since that time we have got together with Victoria a 
couple of times a month.  Sometimes just the three of us, and sometimes with 
some other friends of hers, and none of us have every regretted a moment of it, 
or at least I know I haven't.  There are many other stories that I could tell, 
but that is for another time.  For now I'll just say, Merry Christmas, and I 
hope your New Year is as happy as mine promises to be.


How the Grinch (Almost) Stole Christmas

Every Who down in Who-ville loved Christmas - a lot!
But the Grinch, who lived on Mt. Crumpit, did not!

"All the singing and laughing," he grumbled in spite.
"All the presents and parties on Christmas night!"
"I hate Christmas!" he said to his dog Max with a sneer.
"And I'm going to stop it from coming this year!"

With some rusty old scissors and a needle and thread,
he sewed up a Santa Claus hat for his head.
He added a red coat, and some wadded up gauze,
then some ratty red trousers - he looked like Santa Claus.

Down into Who-ville he slunk late that night, 
to the first house he found that did not show a light.
Down through the chimney he slid with a *bump*
and he picked himself up, slightly rubbing his rump.

He grabbed up the presents, chortling with glee.
He even took the all the ornaments which hung on the tree.
He was taking the stockings when he heard a small sound.
He paused in his work, and then turned around.

There in the doorway stood a young pretty Who.
It was Cindy Loo Who, who was just twenty-two.
Her breasts they were ample, her hips they were slim.
And her barely-there nightgown greatly excited him.

"I know you're not Santa," she said, with a pout.
"But the mean, nasty Grinch, I've heard so much about.
But the stories never said, they just weren't quite clear,
about the sizable lump I can see right down here!"

She rubbed her hand along the front of his pants,
then gave it a squeeze that made his heart dance.
Her eyes lighted up, and she gave a small gasp,
then she opened his trousers by releasing the clasp.

She reached deep inside, and stroked his thick member,
and what happened next she would always remember.
The Grinch's thick cock, which was large anyway,
Well, they say down in Who-ville - it grew three sizes that day!

She threw off her nightgown, and laid down on the floor.
"Fuck me!" she begged him. "And then fuck me some more!"
The presents forgotten, he dropped down beside her,
and with one mighty thrust, he was deeply inside her!

And as he thrust into her with his mighty thing,
Why Cindy Loo Who - she started to sing:

"You're a big one, Mr. Grinch!
You're cock is hard as steel!
You fuck just like a rabbit,
you pound me with great zeal!
Mr. Griiiiiinnnch!

There are three words I'd like to
say to you: Make. Me. Squeal!"

And with a great, loud yell, Cindy Loo Who came!
She came, and she came, and she came, and she came!
And when she was finished, she looked down at his pole,
which was undiminished, and ready for another hole!

She sucked him and fucked him, all through the night.
And he kept up with her, with no end in sight!
'Til finally he collapsed, gasping on the floor.
And the Grinch, wholly spent, breathed out "No more!"

He picked himself up, groaning and sated,
and look down at Cindy Loo, whom he had underrated.
For she clamored for more, and clutched at his leg.
"I can't!" he cried, "No matter how much you beg!"

He fled from her house, as the sun started to rise,
and back to Mt. Crumpit, for he thought it was wise.
To leave the Whos down in Who-ville quite on their own,
and leave them their Christmas, though it made him moan.

And they say down in Who-ville, that to this very day,
On every Chrismas Eve, you can see making her way
To the top of Mt. Crumpit, and though you might flinch,
Cindy Loo pounds on his door - begging for her Grinch!

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Let me start out by giving my apologies to Dr. Seuss (AKA Dr. Theodor Seuss 
Geisel). For those of you who are unfamiliar with the story of the Grinch, I 
suggest you first try here: 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/How_the_Grinch_Stole_Christmas!_(TV_special), as 
this poem is based more upon the 1966 TV special than it is on the original 1957 
book by the same name (although the TV special and the book are very close).  
Please don't go by the movie "The Grinch" with Jim Carrey, which features some 
elements from the book and TV series, but is nothing like the originals. 


A Visit from St. Nick
By Purple Dragon

'Twas the night before Christmas, and I was alone.
My work was all done; I'd cleaned up my home.

My stocking were hung in the bathroom to dry.
I was not at all tired, but sleep I would try.

I went to my room, and got into bed,
While visions of lust sweetly played though my head.

Dressed just in a nightshirt to keep off the chill,
I tossed and I turned as though I were ill.

Then down 'twixt my legs there arose such a hunger,
My hand dropped below to examine the wonder.

With a mind of their own, my legs opened wide.
I tore open my shirt, and I cast it aside.

One hand on a breast, on my skin white as snow,
The other traced paths as it moved down below.

What my wandering touches found caused me to moan,
My cunt dripping wet, my nips hard as stone.

I reached for my nightstand, and opened it quick,
And took my red dildo that I called St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles my breathing became,
As I lowered St. Nick, and I took careful aim.

As I slipped it inside, my head started to spin,
So I pushed a bit more, and then all the way in.

To the back of my pussy, stretching the wall.
Pull it out, push it in, I needed it all.

I slipped it in gently; I thrust it in rough.
I tried all I could, but it wasn't enough.

Nipples and clit, I rubbed both with my hand.
It felt pretty good, but I needed a man.

And then in a twinkling I heard overhead,
Someone up on the roof, and I sprang from my bed

I rushed to the living room.  What did I see?
A man by the fireplace, looking at me.

The beard and red suit he wore caused me to pause.
Surely not.  It can't be.  But it was.  Santa Claus!

He put down his sack, and then took a step in,
Gave my body a look, and then started to grin.

"My poor dear," he said.  "You need help I can see."
Then he reached for by breasts, his eyes twinkling with glee.

As his hands roamed my body I started to moan,
At incredible feelings, like nothing I've known.

I exploded in bliss from the touch of his hand.
I begged him, "don't stop!" but that wasn't his plan.

"No need for wishes, no reason to plead."
He unfastened his belt, and said, "here's what you need."

His body was portly, and far, far past young,
But he opened his pants, and my god, was he hung.

He smiled with amusement.  I gawked in surprise,
At the length and the girth, the incredible size.

He spoke no more words, but went straight to his work,
And filled all my holes, and then turned with a jerk.

And tucking his cock back inside of his clothes,
And giving a wink, up the chimney he rose.

I heard as he bounded back into his sleigh.
Before I knew what, he was soaring away.

But I heard him exclaim, as I wished him good luck,
"Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good fuck."

*	*	*

Game Reviews

Santa's Little Helper
Review by Purple Dragon

Game Info:        Santa's Little Helper
Author:           A. Bomire
Release Date:     March 26, 2004
Platform:         TADS 2
Size:             626KB
Content:          mf, mff
Type:             PF
Length:           Medium
Reviewed:         December 2008
Extras:           Pictures (see below)


Basic Story

You play Wendell, Santa's personal assistant.  The big night is tonight, but 
there are a few problems that have to be taken care of first.  If any one of 
them goes unsolved then it could mean having to cancel Christmas altogether this 
year.  That is simply not an option, so it's your job to make sure that 
everything is taken care of in time.

Overall Thoughts

This is a great game.  As is always the case with A. Bomire's games, it is well 
written, hot, and free of bugs.  The story and puzzles merge together to make an 
enjoyable and believable game (unless, of course, you're one of those lunatics 
that think Santa Claus doesn't really exist).

Puzzles/Game Play

There are a lot of puzzles in this game, and if you are one of those people who 
don't like to have to work a bit to get to the sex then this is probably not for 
you.  The puzzles are not terribly difficult, but they aren't exactly easy 
either.  The main thing is that they make sense within the world that the author 
has created, and when this is the case, solving puzzles can be an experience 
that adds to the overall enjoyment of the game.

Sex

The main sexual interest is Mrs. Claus, and what a hottie she is.  Things 
between her and the big guy have been a bit strained lately, due to the fact 
that his interest in sex has been absent in recent months.  Well, if he isn't 
going to take care of his wife, then someone has to, and you're just the elf for 
the job.

A. Bomire builds the sexual tension quite nicely throughout the game.  Although 
there is no actual sex until the end, there are a few experiences along the way 
that will keep your motor running.

Once you have saved Christmas, and Santa is safely on his way to deliver 
presents to all the little tykes, then it is time for a little alone time with 
the missus.  Joining her at her cottage, you are treated to a very nice little 
scene that can play out in multiple rooms and includes more sex than most men 
(or elves) could hope to have in a night.  But it doesn't stop there.  It seems 
that the Claus' have quite the little pad under their cottage, and who is 
waiting for you there but Sara, a friend of Mrs. Claus who has come for a visit.

If you liked what happened upstairs, you're going to love this as you proceed to 
do both ladies all over the underground love nest. 

Technical

The thing that always impresses me about A. Bomire's games is not only that they 
are free of bugs, but that he tends to do some fairly complicated things, and 
they are still free of bugs.  There are little details throughout, like 
description changing slightly depending on what rooms you're in, that make the 
game seem not just clean, but polished.

Extras

The game has a very interesting way of adding some multimedia to the mix.  With 
the correct login and password for the in-game computer system, it is possible 
to bring up a couple of 'videos' stored on the system.  The videos are actually 
a series of still photos with a running commentary of what is going on in the 
video.  They read like illustrated stories, and are pretty damn hot in their own 
right.  Once you access the system, there is also an option to skip past all the 
puzzles and go directly to the end of the game.  So if you are the type of 
person who doesn't like puzzles all that much, you have the option of just 
solving this one, and then skipping the rest.

Final Thoughts

To repeat myself, this is a great game.  It has a nice story, good characters, 
logical puzzles, and hot sex.  If you haven't played it yet, I highly recommend 
it.  Don't wait, download it and play it now.

Rating: A-

*	*	*

Programming Erin

This month we start to get into the sexual commands.  Obviously, in any AIF 
game, this is where you will be spending a large part of your time.  What kind 
of clothing system will you use?  Are you going to use an arousal system?  If 
so, what kind and how detailed will it be?  Who will be involved in the sex?  
Where will it take place?  Will it be different in different rooms?  At 
different times?  In different circumstances?  And oh, by the way, exactly what 
kind of commands are you going to allow in the first place?

These are all questions that each author is going to have to answer for 
themselves.  Our task this month is just to get you started with a couple of 
sexual commands that you will probably find in most games.  Remember that the 
focus of this feature is on comparing how to do things in the different 
platforms, and not to write a comprehensive tutorial.  Since most of the 
commands are handled in roughly the same way, a couple of examples will 
hopefully be sufficient to achieve this goal.  And that is, I believe, quite 
enough ado.  Let's get to it.

TADS 3 Segment by Knight Errant

In order for the game to be able to process sex commands, we need to define sex 
verbs.  This is very similar to how we defined the "call" verb several months 
back.  Since most sex verbs we will use are verbs with one object (fuck X, lick 
Y, etc), we will deal with that here.  A more complete game would also include 
verbs with no objects (jack off), as well as verbs with two objects (fuck X with 
Y), and for the sake of completeness we will include them as well.

For a verb with no objects (an intransitive verb), first we need to define the 
action, like so:

	DefineIAction(Masturbate)
		execAction() { gActor.masturbate(); }
	;

The execAction defines what the action will actually do.  In this case, the verb 
definition just redirects the action handling back to the actor performing the 
action.  Whenever an actor runs a masturbate command, the command will simply 
call the masturbate method on the actor performing the action.  Next, we need to 
define the vocabulary associated with the masturbate action, so that there's a 
way for the player to trigger a masturbate command.

   	VerbRule(Masturbate)
     		'masturbate' | ('jerk' | 'jack' ) 'off'
     		: MasturbateAction
     		verbPhrase = 'masturbate/masturbating'
   	;

The first line defines a name for this verb rule.The second line defines the 
vocabulary that the player can type at the command prompt to trigger the action.  
In this case, we've defined it as >masturbate, >jack off, or >jerk off.  Of 
course, more synonyms should be included for a real game.  The third line means 
that this VerbRule is associated with the MasturbateAction that we just defined.  
Finally, the fourth line defines how the game should refer to this action, for 
example if masturbation is triggered as an automatic action.

Of course, the definition of Actor doesn't normally include a masturbate method, 
so right now the game will recognize the masturbate action but will just reply 
with "Nothing obvious happens".  We need to define masturbation on every actor 
who could possibly masturbate.  It would also be a good idea to modify the 
definition of Actor to add the masturbate method.  For details of how to do 
that, see the "How to Create Verbs" article in the TADS 3 Technical Manual.  For 
now, we'll just go back to our definition of the PC and add a masturbate method, 
like this.

	me: Person 'you' 'you' @ chair
    		"Just an average Joe.  "
    		isHim = true
    		posture=sitting
    		masturbate()
    		{
        		if(location == erinOffice && erin.curState(erinSexy))
        		{
				"<q>Oh yeah, jerk off for me!</q> Erin moans as you 	
				stroke your cock.  She kneels down before you, opening 
				her sexy lips for you.  You feel the pleasure peaking 
				and you spurt your cum into her mouth.  Erin swallows, 
				grinning.  ";
        		}
        		else
            		"Not here.";
    		}
	;

This way, the player will be permitted to masturbate if the player is in Erin's 
Office and Erin's current actor state is erinSexy, the sex-permitted state.  
Otherwise, he'll get a simple refusal.  

Next is a verb with one object, much like the call verb.

	DefineTAction(Fuck);

	VerbRule(Fuck)
   		('fuck' | 'boff' | 'hump') singleDobj
   		: FuckAction
   		verbPhrase = 'fuck/fucking (what)'
	;

The only difference between defining a transitive verb and an intransitive verb 
is that after the vocabulary possibilities we add singleDobj.  SingleDobj means 
that the player will only be able to fuck one object per command.  Finally, 
since a player can attempt to fuck any random object in the game, we need to 
modify the definition of Thing so that it has a "you can't fuck that" message, 
like so:

	modify Thing
    		dobjFor(Fuck)
    		{
      		verify() 
      		{
        			illogical('{That dobj/him} isn\'t appealing to fuck. ');
      		}
    		}
	;

You can define "rub" and "lick" in the same way.  Now, in order to allow the 
player to fuck Erin, we need to define a dobjFor(Fuck) method on Erin and on 
each of her fuckable body parts (mouth, pussy, ass, tits, typically).  This can 
be as complicated as you would like to make it, it all depends on how complex 
you would like to make your sex system.  Complicated doesn't necessarily equal 
better, of course.  In this demo, we'll just output a simple description instead 
of mucking about with arousal levels.  Here it is.

	+ pussy: Component 'pussy/snatch/vagina' 'pussy'
    		"Her pussy is shaved bare.  "
    		dobjFor(Fuck)
    		{
			action()
			{
				"<q>If you want those pictures back,</q> you whisper, 
				<q>you'll have to let me fuck you.</q>  You turn Erin 
				around and force her over her desk.  She yelps in 	
				surprise and moans when you reach between her legs, 	
				discovering that she's not wearing panties.  You 	
				unbuckle your pants and slowly slide your cock into her 
				dripping pussy.  <q>You're such a naughty girl, fucking 
				your coworker in your office.</q> Erin just moans in 	
				response, gripping the desk and grinding her ass back at 
				you.  <.p>
				<q>Oh yes, I'm your dirty girl!  Oh god, fuck me!</q>  
				Her words fade into moans, her body writhing against you 
				as you pound your cock deep into her, gripping the swell 
				of her hips for leverage.  She arches her back, 	
				screaming as she climaxes.  Once she calms down from her 
				orgasm, Erin turns around and expertly sucks your cock 
				until your climax.";
			}
    		}
	;

Now the "fuck" command is functional, but it still won't function the way we 
want.  As it stands, the game will permit you to fuck Erin at any point in the 
game, which obviously isn't the desired effect.  The easiest way to work around 
this is to take advantage of the fact that we should only permit Erin to be 
fuckable when she's in the erinSexy ActorState.  All ActorStates have  
BeforeAction and AfterAction methods.  These allow you to define special 
conditions for actions that take place when the actor is in the given state.  
For example, in this case we want to prevent the lick, rub, and suck actions 
when Erin is in the erinTalking ActorState.  Here's an example of how to do 
that.

	+ erinTalking: ActorState
    		stateDesc = "She's talking to you.  "
    		specialDesc = "Erin is standing here, talking to you.  "
    		beforeAction()
    		{
        		if(gActionIn(Lick, Rub, Fuck))
        		{
				"Without warming Erin up to the idea first, that's only 
				likely to get you fired.";
		  		exit;
        		}
    		}
	;

gAction is a shorthand way to refer to the action being performed in a 
particular command, and gActionIn simply checks if the action is included in the 
following list.  If it is, it displays our message and then exits: cancels the 
normal action of the command.

Unfortunately I wasn't able to include as much content in this edition of 
Programming Erin as I would have liked, so clothing and ending the game will 
have to be delayed until next month.

TADS 2 Segment by A. Bomire

Okay, this month we are moving on to defining sex verbs. This won't be a lot 
different than when we defined the "call" verb earlier, except with that verb we 
defined it to work on objects that were not in the same room as the player. Sex 
verbs can be defined that way as well, but it really doesn't make much sense to 
do so.

 One thing we haven't done as of yet is define a verb which has no objects (like 
look or north). These verbs are defined similarly to the callVerb we previously 
defined, except that you don't define a doAction for the verb. It simply has an 
action method. Let's define a verb to allow the player or Erin to masturbate:

	masturbateVerb: deepverb
     		sdesc = "masturbate"
    		 verb = 'masturbate' 
     		action (actor) = 
    		 {
           			actor.jackoff;
     		}
	;

 Now, you'll notice that instead of displaying a description of the player 
masturbating, I have redirected output to a property of the actor who is 
masturbating. This could be either the player, or Erin (or another character if 
our game were larger). This allows us to associate the description of the player 
or Erin masturbating with that character, which is more convenient that having 
it defined along with the verb. Defining a verb this way has one draw back: 
there is no associated verDoMasturbate verification routine to verify that it is 
okay to masturbate. We could put the checks in with the jackoff description we 
are going to write, or we could put it directly into the action method defined 
for the verb, whichever is more convenient. Just for argument's sake, let's put 
the check into the jackoff description.

 To begin with, we only want to perform sex verbs when Erin and the player are 
in her office together. Also, only after the player has confronted her about the 
pictures. In last month's discussion, we put the confrontation code into the 
game. We are assuming that Erin will be ready to have sex after confronting her 
about the pictures. To make this simple to remember, we'll add another property 
to Erin's character definition, called isSexy, and set this property to true 
after confronting her. This involves a slight modification to the code we set up 
last month:

	isSexy = nil
	doAskAbout(actor, iobj) = 
	{
     		if (iobj = pictures)
   		{
       			"\"I found these pictures in your desk,\" you tell her, 
      			 showing her the lewd photos.  Her eyes grow wide.\b
       			 \"Please give those back,\" Erin pleads. \"I'll do 	
				whatever you want,\" she whispers erotically.  You grin 
				widely at her offer, knowing exactly what you're going 
				to ask for.";
    			unnotify(Erin, &Converse);
    			Erin.isSexy := true;
    		}
    		else
        			self.disavow;
	}

Now, we have a method of knowing if Erin is ready to have sex with the player, 
and we can use this to verify that the player doesn't attempt to masturbate 
until the correct time:

	modify Me
     		jackoff = 
     		{
           			if (not (Erin.isVisible(Me) and Erin.isSexy) )
              				 "Not now! ";
           			else
               			"\"Oh yeah, jerk off for me!\" Erin moans as you 
               			stroke your cock.  She kneels down before you, 	
					opening her sexy lips for you.  You feel the 	
					pleasure peaking and you spurt your cum into her 
					mouth.  Erin swallows,
               			grinning. ";
      		}
	;

Okay, now the player will masturbate for Erin. Getting Erin to masturbate for 
the player presents another challenge. By default, TADS actor objects will not 
follow the player's commands. You have to tell TADS it is okay for the actor to 
respond to the character. This is done using using a method defined for each 
Actor object called actorAction. According to the TADS documentation 
"actorAction(verb, directObject, preposition, indirectObject) method specifies 
what happens when the actor is given a command by the player; by default, the 
actor ignores the command and displays a message to this effect." As you can see 
by the arguments, you can get very granular when verifying if an actor will 
respond to the command. For us, we'll only check on the verb. We'll modify 
Erin's object to allow her to respond to being asked to masturbate. For all 
other commands, we'll revert back to the default action by passing control to 
the previously defined actorAction:

	actorAction( v, d, p, i) = 
	{
     		if (v = masturbateVerb) exit;
     		else pass actorAction;
	}

 As you can see, not much needs to be defined. We use the exit function to stop 
processing the actorAction method, and then TADS will not object to Erin 
responding to the masturbateVerb. Of course, right now Erin doesn't have a 
jackoff property like the player does, so nothing will be displayed anyway. 
Adding in a description of Erin masturbating for the player, and making sure 
that it only takes place at the appropriate time is an exercise that I leave for 
you.

 Next, we'll define a verb that allows the player to perform some sort of sexual 
action upon Erin, such as fucking her. Again, this is very similar to the 
callVerb we previously defined, so I'm not going to go into a whole lot of 
detail here. Because I am very creative in my verb naming, I'm going to call 
this verb fuckVerb:

	fuckVerb: deepverb
     		sdesc = "fuck"
     		verb = 'fuck' 'boff' 'roger'
     		doAction = 'Fuck'
	;

As we did with the callVerb, I am going to make sure that the player cannot have 
sex with the desk, or chairs, or other objects. This is done by modifying the 
thing object:

	modify thing
     		 verDoFuck (actor) = 
     		 {
         			 "You want to do WHAT to <<self.thedesc>>? ";
      		}
	;

Now, the next part is to override this verification method for Erin, and any 
body part of Erin's that we wish to allow the player to fuck. This would 
probably include her breasts, pussy and ass, but it may not be necessarily 
limited to just those objects. For our demonstration, let's write a description 
of fucking Erin. Someplace within the definition of the Erin object, we would 
add the following:

	verDoFuck(actor) =
	{
      		if (not self.isSexy)
        			 "Not now! ";
	}
	doFuck(actor) = 
	{
     		"\"If you want those pictures back,\" you whisper, \"you'll have 
     		to let me fuck you.\"  You turn Erin around and force her over her 
     		desk.  She yelps in surprise and moans when you reach between her 
     		legs, discovering that she's not wearing panties.  You unbuckle your 
     		pants and slowly slide your cock into her dripping pussy.  \"You're 
     		such a naughty girl, fucking your coworker in your office.\" Erin 
     		just moans in response, gripping the desk and grinding her ass back 
     		at you.  
    		 \b \"Oh yes, I'm your dirty girl!  Oh god, fuck me!\"  Her words 
		fade into moans, her body writhing against you as you pound your 	
		cock deep into her, gripping the swell of her hips for leverage.  
		She arches her back, screaming as she climaxes.  Once she calms down 
		from her orgasm, Erin turns around and expertly sucks your cock 	
		until your climax.";
	}

To have Erin turn around and fuck the player, you would follow the same 
techniques as we did for having Erin masturbate and modify her actorAction 
method, and then define the above two verification and action methods for the 
player. To have the player fuck her body parts, simply define the above two 
methods for each fuckable body part. One suggestion, I usually assume that 
fucking Erin's pussy is the same as fucking Erin, and have a single description 
for fucking either object. This means that you can either redirect the output 
from fucking Erin's pussy to the same as fucking Erin, or vice-versa.

As it turns out, TADS has a special function just for doing something like this. 
By using the "->" characters (minus the quotes), you can redirect any verb to 
another object, and have it act as if the player had directed the command 
towards that object instead of the original object. That sounds more confusing 
that it actually is. Let's assume that we have created a pussy object for Erin, 
called ErinsPussy. To have TADS treat fucking her pussy the same as fucking 
Erin, we will redirect the fuckVerb direct-object code to Erin, like this:

	ErinsPussy: fixeditem
    		doFuck -> Erin
	;

In this way, when the player types "fuck pussy", TADS reacts as if he had typed 
"fuck erin", and the verDoFuck and doFuck methods defined for Erin are executed.

Okay, these are extremely simplistic implementations of these sex verbs, as they 
don't take into account any arousal of Erin or the player, or what (if any) 
articles of clothing they are wearing, or if either of them is seated in the 
chair or on the desk or ... well, there are myriads of things to track. But, you 
can see from this basis how to build upon it to address any situation that might 
crop up.

Next month, we shall wrap up the Programming Erin segment by defining some 
clothing for our characters, and creating an ending for the game.

ADRIFT Segment by BBBen

Okay, I'm back this month, but I find myself in a tricky situation trying to 
transfer ADRIFT 'programming' over to the same sort of things that are needed 
for TADS. The way we've structured things in this series is "here's how to do 
things in TADS, and then here's how to do the same thing in the other 
platforms". However, ADRIFT's more basic functions are so simple that we've 
really already covered them. Because of that I may be repeating myself a little 
here, but I'll outline how to do sex commands for a traditional SSS (a "steamy 
sex scene" in which you have a series of interactive sex commands available like 
"rub tits" and "fuck pussy").

We'll skip over how to get the character's clothes off, as we're dealing with 
clothes next week, though I'd normally deal with that first. Decide what room 
you're going to have your sex scene in, who's going to be involved, etc., and 
you may even want to write the actual text of the sex scene in a word document 
first. The sex commands themselves will be handled with tasks, of course, 
because most things are handled with tasks in ADRIFT, so it really only comes 
down to what restrictions and actions you want to add to your tasks. Make sure 
your sample sex task (for the sake of this example we'd be best served by 
parting from KE's example and we'll make a "rub pussy" task) is set to be 
complete-able in the right room, and we'll continue.

Now, in a threesome with two girls you might need to distinguish between body 
parts of the two girls, for instance you would need two separate tasks, one 
called "rub erin's pussy" and one called "rub betty's pussy". (Remember to let 
players know they will need to type the names in this event; oh, and please be 
consistent with your apostrophes in their names!) We're not coding a threesome 
right now, so we have the option to make the commands more generic, allowing a 
simple "rub pussy" command. A good thing to do, however, would be to stick an 
asterisk 'wild card' into the command so that players can include Erin's name if 
they want to. Therefore in the spot labelled "What the user must type:" you 
would put "rub * pussy", and it will now accept the player typing either "rub 
pussy" or "rub erin's pussy". Actually, it would also accept "rub hello my name 
is francis pussy", but as that's unlikely to come up, we can safely not worry 
about it. There's only really one word that the player is likely to stick 
between "rub" and "pussy", and this command will not overlap with an "erin rub 
pussy" command, because you don't have a wildcard in front of the word "rub".

Anyway, stick the sex text into the "Message upon completion" box. Right now it 
might be worth bringing up something about ADRIFT: simple sex scenes are easy to 
make, but complex sex systems are significantly harder to make, and will require 
a lot of work. It is entirely possible to make an 'arousal system' for ADRIFT 
like you find in TADS games, but the problem is that it's not built in for you 
like it would be if you were using one of the established TADS sex libraries. If 
you want to do that, you'll need to put in all the variables and requisite tasks 
yourself, and I don't have time to explain all that here right now, so I'm going 
to make this a simple sex scene, more of the style of the scenes in the games 
I've actually released, rather than the ones I have in development.

So let's move on to the "restrictions" tab. An obvious restriction to include 
would be that Erin is actually in the room. Create a new restriction and in the 
top drop-down box select "Player and Characters". Then use the other drop-down 
boxes to make the sentence "Erin must be in same room as Player". Since the task 
can only be done in the relevant room, this will be sufficient. In "else 
display", put in some text to appear if the player's trying to rub her pussy 
while she's not there, like "Erin isn't here." Next, you'd probably also include 
a restriction to make sure they were naked, but as we're skipping clothing this 
month we'll assume that this sex scene is a "clothes fetish" scene and the 
characters are remaining dressed. If there are other conditions needed for the 
sex to start you need to include a restriction for them too, so that the player 
can't just rub her pussy with no lead-in at all. For example, you might want to 
make all the sex tasks require that you've already given Erin a certain object, 
or something (usually accomplished by simply making this task require that a 
previous task, like last month's "ask erin about pictures" task, have been 
completed).

Okay, in this more simple sex scene we can just move on to the actions tab. You 
don't actually need to do anything with this tab, though if you want the task to 
change the player's score then add an action, use the drop down box to select 
"change score" and enter a number into "Change score by:". I tend to give one 
point per sex act, so that players can see how many sex acts they may have 
missed in the game.

Okay, next is the "repeatable" tab. If you want the player to be able to type 
the task over and over again and get the same response, just make the task 
repeatable by ticking the "repeatable" box. As the text says, any positive score 
will only count the first time. Let's assume, however, that you would rather 
that a shorter response be displayed for all repeat actions, after the full-
length one is displayed the first time. In that case you would not tick "repeat 
task", but instead would put the secondary text into the box labelled "Message 
if task tried again". This should work most of the time, though if you're 
getting into more advanced systems, you may start to look at giving repeat 
messages a whole separate task, or using the ALR file to deal with it.

You can now "add task" and the task is ready to go. There are a few more 
complexities, such as ending an SSS, but as there's no definitive way to do 
that, I won't go into any real detail here. I will say, however, that you don't 
want the sex commands to still work after the SSS is finished, so a simple way 
to end the scene would be to move the girl out of the room, so that those "Erin 
must be in same room as Player" restrictions will kick in and prevent any 
problems.

That should pretty much cover it for this month. As I say, it gets way more 
complicated if you want to include an arousal system with separate orgasm 
responses and everything, but it's questionable whether those are really needed, 
and they're generally not expected from an ADRIFT game, so for this tutorial on 
the basics we'll skip it.

Inform 6 Segment by 'trix

Before I get onto this month's stuff, thanks to Pilgrimm53, who pointed out to 
me a bug in some earlier bit of code. Of course, it was deliberate, and 
Pilgrimm53 wins the fabulous prize for spotting it. The rest of you (assuming 
there is anyone else) need to buck your ideas up and pay more attention.
Where I wrote the Call interception for Erin's Life property, I had a condition

  if (Erin notin erinOffice)

This fires even if Erin is sitting on a chair and the chair is in the office, 
since in and notin only consider direct containment. The condition should be

  if (~~IndirectlyContains(ErinOffice, Erin))

Pilgrimm53 also observed that the door to Erin's office is not overtly mentioned 
in the game. This is because it has the scenery attribute. If anyone wants it to 
be mentioned, feel free to knock the scenery attribute off, and then I you might 
try using when_open and when_closed to customise its announcement (see DM4 for 
details).

First on the agenda for this month is defining new actions.
Define the following new grammar. New grammar should go after Include "Grammar"; 
in your source code.

	Verb 'masturbate'
    		*               -> Masturbate;
	Verb 'wank' 'jerk' 'jack' 'jill'
    		* 'off'         -> Masturbate;

For this to work, we need to write the MasturbateSub routine, which provides the 
default behaviour for the Masturbate action. It can be pretty simple, since all 
the interesting stuff will be in custom responses.

	[ MasturbateSub;
		"This is not the time or the place.";
	];

In a more full game, you'd also want the grammar to accept "Masturbate <someone 
else>" etc., but for our purposes this is sufficient.

Following the TADS 3 section of Programming Erin, we want a custom response for 
the player masturbating in Erin's office under certain conditions. Since this is 
predicated on Erin's presence, the obvious place to put it is in Erin's 
react_before routine.

    react_before
    [;
      ....
      Masturbate:
        if (self.conversation_stage >= 6)
           "~Oh yeah, jerk off for me,~ Erin moans as
           you stroke your cock. She kneels down before you,
           opening her sexy lips for you. You feel the
           pleasure peaking, and you spurt your cum into
           her mouth. Erin swallows and grins.";
    ],

If you have defined an object representing the player-character's penis, a very 
sensible thing to do would be to redirect commands to touch it to the 
masturbation action. (Doing things like this is how we avoid guess-the-verb 
bugs.)

(In the penis object:)

	....
		before
		[;
       	Touch, Rub: <<Masturbate>>;
		],
	....

Next, a fairly crucial action: fucking. The standard I6 library defines "fuck" 
as one of several verbs classified as "strong swearing", so we have to extend 
and replace the existing grammar this time.

	Extend only 'fuck' replace
    		* creature      -> Fuck
    		* noun          -> Fuck;

The creature token means "this verb prefers to refer to a person rather than an 
inanimate object". The line below means "but it can also apply to an inanimate 
object". The verb "screw" (meaning turn) is also in the I6 library.

	Extend only 'screw' replace
    		* creature      -> Fuck
    		* noun          -> Fuck;

Add some synonyms (as many as you can be bothered) thus:

	Verb 'boff' 'hump' 'bonk' = 'fuck';

And the default behaviour:

	[ FuckSub;
   		if (noun==player)
     		"That would be both difficult and impossible.";
   		"You can't fuck ", (the) noun,".";
	];

Of the other verbs we might want, some are in the standard library: touch, rub, 
kiss, squeeze, taste, eat, blow. To change their default behaviour (which is 
usually advisable), put a Replace TouchSub; (or whateverSub) directive in your 
code before including VerbLib, and then write a new TouchSub in your code. You 
might also want to add suck and lick. It's easiest to handle if you direct all 
similar verbs to a single action, so you might want to direct all touching verbs 
to Touch, and all oral verbs to Taste.

Before I start developing Erin's anatomy any further: in most AIF there are 
several girls, which means several pairs of breasts, several vaginas etc. So 
it's advisable to use classes for those things. Here's one such class:

	Class Pussy class Bodypart ! pussy is a subclass of bodypart
 		with name 'pussy' 'cunt' 'vagina' ! add your preferred synonyms
        	'pussies//p' 'cunts//p' 'vaginas//p',
      	short_name "pussy"
	;

If you wanted to write some default behaviour for touching, licking or fucking a 
pussy, the pussy class is the place to put it.

Here's Erin's vagina with a sexual response. (This needs to go just after the 
definition of Erin so it will be located in her body.)

	Pussy -> erinPussy
 		with article "Erin's" "Erin's" "Erin's",
      		adj 'shaved' 'shaven' 'bare',
      		description "Her pussy is shaved bare.",
      		before
      		[;
        			Fuck:
          		"~If you want those pictures back,~ you whisper,
          		~you'll have to let me fuck you.~^You turn Erin around
          		and force her over the desk. She yelps in surprise,
          		and moans when you reach between her legs, discovering
          		that she's not wearing any panties. You unbuckle
          		your pants and slowly slide your cock into her
          		pussy.^~You're such a naughty girl,~ you tell her,
          		~fucking your coworker in your office.~
          		^In response, Erin moans and grips the desk,
          		grinding her ass back at you.
          		^~Oh yes, I'm your dirty girl! Oh God, fuck me!~
          		^Her words fade back into moans, her body writhing
          		against you as you pound your cock deep into her,
          		gripping the swell of her hips for leverage. She
          		arches her back, screaming as she climaxes.
          		^Once she calms down from her orgasm, Erin turns
          		around and expertly sucks your cock until you
          		climax.";
      		];

In case you were wondering (and I'm sure you were), yes it does seem a bit 
cumbersome to customise the articles on every body-part we write. You can avoid 
it by re-writing the ParserM routine PrefaceByArticle (instructions available on 
request).

We still need to block the fucking action from going ahead until Erin is ready. 
Since it's Erin's willingness in question, it makes sense to put the code into 
Erin's react_before property.

      react_before
      [;
        ....
        Masturbate: return self.check_sex();
        Touch, Taste, Fuck, Kiss:
          if (noun==self ||
              (noun ofclass Bodypart && noun.owner()==self)
            return self.check_sex();
      ],
      check_sex
      [;
        if (self.conversation_stage >= 6)
          rfalse; ! do not block the action
        "At this point, that is only likely to get
        you fired.";
      ],

This prevents the player performing any sexual act on Erin or part of her body 
before she is ready.
Another little piece of conscientious game-writing here: make sure that "Fuck 
Erin" is equivalent to "Fuck Erin's pussy". You can do this by giving Erin a 
before property (which intercepts actions where Erin herself is the object).

      before
      [;
        Fuck: <<Fuck erinPussy>>;
      ],

In general you might also want to redirect Touch and Taste in a similar way. 
Another issue that naturally occurs is that you can examine Erin's pussy at any 
time and get a fairly intimate description of it. Doesn't Erin wear clothes? 
What kind of crazy office is this, and are there any jobs going there? Find out 
next month.

Inform 7 Segment by Purple Dragon

We have already seen how to create an action in Inform 7 when we talked about 
how to call Erin.  The sexual actions are handled in basically the same way, 
although they do tend to be a bit more complicated than some others are.  To 
show you the very basics, I will demonstrate two actions, masturbating, and 
fucking.

	Masturbating is an action applying to nothing.
	Understand "masturbate", "jack off", "jerk off" as masturbating.

This should look fairly familiar.  The first line defines the action, and the 
second tell Inform what the player will be typing to trigger it.  Note that we 
make it an action applying to nothing.  But wait a minute.  In my vast 
experience with the subject of masturbation (purely for research purposes you 
understand) I seem to recall something rather significant almost always being 
involved.  Yes, that's true, but what this refers to is that no object must be 
specified to trigger this action.  In other words, the player would type 
"masturbate," and not "masturbate cock."

	Instead of masturbating:
		If Erin is not in the location begin;
			say "Not here.";
		otherwise if erin is not ready for sex;
			say "Without warming Erin up to the idea first, that's only 
			likely to get you fired.";
		otherwise;
			say "'Oh yeah, jerk off for me!' Erin moans as you stroke your 
			cock.  She kneels down before you, opening her sexy lips for 
			you.  You feel the pleasure peaking and you spurt your cum 	
			into her mouth.  Erin swallows, grinning.";
		end if.

And here is where we define what actually happens when the player tries it.  
First we check to make sure Erin is present.  I don't know if I've mentioned 
this before or not, but "the location" is a variable in Inform that means "The 
same location as the player."  You can change this to test if someone or 
something is in the same location as whatever else, but written by itself like 
this, that's what it means.  Anyway, if she is, then we check to make sure that 
she is ready for sex.  Remember that "ready for sex" was the property that we 
defined and gave Erin for just this type of situation.  If all that is ok, then 
we get the printout of what actually happens.  Now, on to fucking.

	Fucking is an action applying to one thing.
	Understand "fuck [something]" or "screw [something]" as fucking.

Unlike masturbating, here we define it as an action applying to one thing since 
the player will need to define exactly what it is that he wants to fuck.

	Instead of fucking erin's pussy:
		If Erin is not in the location begin;
			say "Erin isn't here at the moment you know.";
		otherwise if erin is not ready for sex;
			say "Without warming Erin up to the idea first, that's only 
			likely to get you fired.";
		otherwise;
			say "'If you want those pictures back,' you whisper, 'you'll 
			have to let me fuck you.'  You turn Erin around and force her 
			over her desk.  She yelps in surprise and moans when you reach 
			between her legs, discovering that she's not wearing panties.  
			You unbuckle your pants and slowly slide your cock into her 
			dripping pussy.  'You're such a naughty girl, fucking your 	
			coworker in your office.' Erin just moans in response, 	
			gripping the desk and grinding her ass back at you.[paragraph 
			break]'Oh yes, I'm your dirty girl!  Oh god, fuck me!'  Her 
			words fade into moans, her body writhing against you as you 
			pound your cock deep into her, gripping the swell of her hips 
			for leverage.  She arches her back, screaming as she climaxes.  
			Once she calms down from her orgasm, Erin turns around and 	
			expertly sucks your cock until your climax.";
		end if.

And the rest works pretty much like masturbating did.  Remember that up until 
this point we haven't actually created a pussy for Erin (poor dear) so be sure 
to remedy that.  Now, the clever reader might have noticed one or two problems 
with what I did above, and by "one or two" I mean a whole boatload.  While this 
might appear to be the simplest way to handle things, in reality it's going to 
end up meaning a whole lot more work since you basically have to start over with 
every character and every body part.  The following is a bit more advanced, but 
it addresses a lot of the problems that would otherwise arise.

Before getting into the action itself, lets take a little closer look at body 
parts.  You may recall that when we created Erin's tits, we did it this way.

	Erin's tits are part of Erin.  The description is "Her perky breasts are 
	about a C-cup."

This works fine if we only have one NPC, but if we have more we would be forced 
to do the same thing for every character.  Luckily, there is a better way to 
handle it by creating a new 'kind'.

	A body-part is a kind of thing.

	Some tits are a kind of body-part.
	Tits are part of every woman.  
	Understand "tit/tits/breast/breasts/boob/boobs" as tits.

First we create a new kind called a 'body-part.'  Then we can use this kind when 
we create the individual parts.  The line "Tits are part of every woman" does 
just what it sounds like.  Every time we create another woman in our game she is 
automatically given that body part.  We don't have to worry about creating it 
manually or defining synonyms every time.  Another benefit is that we now have 
all the body parts in the game defined as the new kind 'body-part.'  This allows 
us to write rules pertaining to all body parts in the game at one time, which we 
will use below.  Now, let's see if we can come up with a better way to handle 
the fucking action.

	Fucking is an action applying to one thing.
	Understand "fuck [something]" or "screw [something]" as fucking.

Look familiar?  Yep, so far it's the same way we handled it above.  When you're 
really writing a game, remember that a few more synonyms here might be a good 
idea.  Now, on to the tricky stuff.

	Before fucking a woman enclosing a pussy (called the snatch):
     		try fucking the snatch instead.

	Before asking someone (called the fucker) to try fucking a woman enclosing 
	a pussy (called the snatch):
		try asking the fucker to try fucking the snatch instead.

	Before asking a woman (called the fucker) to try fucking the player:
		try asking the fucker to try fucking my cock instead.

How we did things the first time around, if the player typed, 'fuck erin's 
pussy' or just 'fuck pussy' then the rule would work fine.  However, if he typed 
'fuck erin,' he would just get a stony silence.  The reason is that Inform now 
understands 'fuck' as a command, but it does not know that fucking a person is 
the same as fucking a body part so if we went that way, we would have to write a 
whole separate rule for when the player tried to fuck the person rather than a 
body part.

What the above does is just to redirect any attempt to fuck a woman, to fucking 
her pussy, whether the player is doing the fucking or asking someone else to.  
The last line would be for cases when the player types something like "Erin, 
fuck me."

	Instead of fucking something that is not a body-part, say "Ohh, kinky.  In 
	fact, a bit too kinky for this game."

	Instead of asking someone to try fucking something that is not a body-	
	part, say "That sounds like a good way to get slapped to me."  

Since we defined the fucking action as 'fuck [something]' the player can 
legitimately try to fuck any object in the game and Inform will expect there to 
be a rule to handle it.  Obviously that is not what we want.  Commands like 
'fuck desk' or 'fuck telephone' just don't make any sense, so to handle those 
situations we add in a rule to make sure that the player can only fuck things 
that we have defined as 'body-parts.'

	Before fucking a body-part (called the target):
		If the target is enclosed by the player, say "The laws of physics 
		aside, that's just sick." instead.

	Before asking someone (called the fucker) to try fucking a body-part 
	(called the target):
		If the target is enclosed by the fucker, say "'Did you just tell me 
		to go fuck myself?' She slaps you across the face and storms out." 
		instead.

These rules test for whether the player is trying to fuck his own body parts or 
asking another character to do the same.  Logically, it should never come up in 
a game, but who said players are always logical so it's usually best to try to 
be thorough.  There are other rules that you might want to add in this vein, but 
you get the idea.  A lot of this type of thing can be handled by a good 
extension.  Most of the above is actually from my own very, very simple 
extension that I have previously released.  If you want to take a look at a much 
better and more complete one, check our Dudeman's new extension, which you can 
download from the AIF Archive.

The two other main sexual actions that almost all AIF games have are 'rubbing' 
and 'licking.'  You can handle these in a similar manner as what we have done 
above.  Once you have defined the rubbing action we have a better (in my 
opinion) way to handle masturbation.  Once the rubbing action is set, the player 
will be able to rub his cock since it is a body part.  Rather than create a 
whole new rule for masturbation, you can just do something like this.

	Before masturbating, try rubbing my cock instead.

Which just redirect the command "masturbate" to the action "rub my cock," and 
saves you from having to write two separate rules.  You can also redirect any 
attempts to ask someone to masturbate, to rubbing the correct body part in a 
similar way.

Well, that's a pretty whirlwind tour of sexual commands and there is a lot more 
left to do, but it should at least give you some things to think about and 
somewhere to start.  Next month we will be finishing up this series so be sure 
to come on back and see how things end up.


*	*	*

AIF Wants You

If you can write game reviews, articles, opinion pieces, humorous essays, or 
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Submitting your work to Inside Erin:

Please direct all comments, articles, reviews, discussion and art to the Editor 
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*	*	*

Staff

Editor:
Purple Dragon has written six AIF games including Archie's Birthday - Chapter 1: 
Reggie's Gift, A Dream Come True, and Time in the Dark. He has received one Erin 
award and been nominated for several others.

Staff:
A Bomire is the author of several TADS AIF games, including Dexter Dixon: In 
Search of the Prussian Pussy, Tomorrow Never Comes and The Backlot. His games 
have won numerous awards and Erin nominations.  He was the co-recipient of the 
Badman Memorial Lifetime Achievement Award in 2006.

A Ninny is an AIF player, author of four AIF games and frequent beta-tester.  
His Parlour received an Erin for Best "One Night Stand" game in 2004 and his 
most recent game, HORSE walked away with three Erins at the 2007 awards show.

BBBen is an author of a number of Adrift AIF games. His games have received 
numerous Erin awards and nominations and first place in A. Bomire's 2004 mini-
comp. He was also the recipient of the 2007 Badman Memorial Lifetime Achievement 
Award. 

Bitterfrost is a longtime IF/AIF player working on his first (and last) game, 
How I Got Syphilix.

Knight Errant is an AIF player who has released two games and is currently 
working on a couple of others.

'trix has released one game, Casting, which was written in Inform 6, and is 
sporadically working on another in TADS 3.